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It seems Pope Francis needs to brush up on his Tertullian!

It has been reported (in The ChristLast Media, I must note) that the current Pope does not like the phrase "lead us not into temptation...

"Let no freedom be allowed to novelty, because it is not fitting that any addition should be made to antiquity. Let not the clear faith and belief of our forefathers be fouled by any muddy admixture." -- Pope Sixtus III

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

From The Death Of The West Department:

Ah, for the want of stricter copyright laws...

From the UK's Daily Mail:

Classics given 50 Shades of Grey makeover that would make Jane Austen and the Brontes blush

Give 'em a stroke, maybe.  

Devotees of Jane Austen or  the Bronte sisters may wish to loosen their corsets and have the smelling salts within reach.

Some of the greatest works of English literature have been controversially ‘sexed up’ for the 21st century.
Following the success of erotic novel Fifty Shades of Grey, one enterprising publisher has given classics such as Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights a bawdy makeover.

he existing texts have been interspersed with more racy scenes – some in toe-curling language that would surely have made the original authors blush.
Other titles to be published in the Clandestine Classics collection include Austen’s Northanger Abbey, Arthur Conan Doyle’s stories featuring Sherlock Holmes and Jules Verne’s 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea.

The announcement comes after ‘mummy porn’ novel Fifty Shades of Grey became the fastest-selling book of the year, making author EL James an estimated £6.5million in book sales and film rights.

However, Jane Eyre fans who are content with the protagonist revealing little more than ‘Reader, I married him’ in the final chapter of the original might be less  than impressed to discover that she has ‘explosive sex with Mr Rochester’ in the publisher’s erotic version.

In Wuthering Heights, meanwhile, heroine Catherine Earnshaw ‘enjoys bondage sessions’ with Heathcliff, while sleuth Sherlock Holmes has a sexual relationship with his sidekick Dr Watson in the updated edition.

 How about "Elementary schoolboys, Watson"?

Previous adaptations of the books, such as the 1995 TV version of Pride and Prejudice starring Jennifer Ehle and Colin Firth as Elizabeth and Darcy, have tended to follow the classic texts more closely. 

But because the copyright on the original titles has lapsed, the publisher is free to adapt them. 

Ann Channon, from Jane Austen’s House Museum, said: ‘I feel it’s almost desperate. A lot of people seem to be looking for a quick fix because they’re bored. They don’t want to use their imaginations.

‘In Pride and Prejudice everything is already there but people are too lazy to bother to understand. There will be a lot of Jane Austen fans banging drums about this and kicking up a fuss.

‘And I don’t think if Jane Austen was alive today she would approve. She was writing with passion, she had heart and feelings but these were restrained by the morals of her time.

‘She held the moral line but she certainly understood passion, she alluded to it in her work

‘Some things are better left to the imagination and Jane Austen encouraged people to use their imaginations. These new “erotic” versions are gratuitous.’ The raunchy versions will be available as e-books priced from £2.49 to £3.49, but may be made into printed copies later if they are a success. 

FIFTY SHADES MAKES MUSIC

As well as dominating the book scene, Fifty Shades of Grey has made its mark on the music world.

A Renaissance choral work by composer Thomas Tallis has topped the UK’s classical singles chart after featuring in the raunchy novel.

The recording of ‘Spem in alium’ by the Tallis Scholars knocked Luciano Pavarotti off the top spot.
The Elizabethan piece, which is played in the novel while the characters are otherwise occupied, has steadily risen through the charts after growing numbers of readers began to download it. Its title translates as ‘hope in any other’.

The publisher behind them, Total-E-Bound, has drafted in some of its most popular writers to update the texts. British-born author Sierra Cartwright, who is penning the new version of Jane Eyre, said: ‘Jane Eyre is a breathtakingly beautiful story which has withstood the test of time. 

‘The biggest challenge is to  be sure it’s fitting with Jane’s  character and that the additions don’t change the beautiful flow of the story.’ 

The first five Clandestine Classics will be released at the end of this month. Claire Siemaszkiewicz, founder of Total-E-Bound, said: ‘Readers will finally be able to read what the books could have been like if erotic romance had been acceptable in that day and age.

‘We recognise it’s a bold move that may have a polarising effect on readers but we’re keeping the works as close to the original classics as possible.

‘It’s not our intention to rewrite or distort them but to create a whole new experience, enhancing the novels by adding deeper relationships, character development, and the “missing” scenes for readers to enjoy.’

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About Me

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First of all, the word is SEX, not GENDER. If you are ever tempted to use the word GENDER, don't. The word is SEX! SEX! SEX! SEX! For example: "My sex is male." is correct. "My gender is male." means nothing. Look it up. What kind of sick neo-Puritan nonsense is this? Idiot left-fascists, get your blood-soaked paws off the English language. Hence I am choosing "male" under protest.

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