John Woodruff, Requiescat in pace.

Jesse Owens was not the only American hero of Berlin's 1936 Olympics.

From the Pittsburgh Tribune Review:

When the excitement of the 1936 Olympic Games ended, gold medalist John Woodruff came home to Fayette County with a small present for his hometown.

A tiny oak sapling from Germany's Black Forest -- a token for all athletes from Adolf Hitler -- would be his gift to the people of Connellsville, who supported his run from the city's south side to a stadium in Berlin.

Some of his teammates tossed their saplings overboard into the ocean to show their disgust at the Nazi regime, he would later tell people. But Woodruff, then a freshman at the University of Pittsburgh, ignored politics and carefully carried the souvenir of his Olympic glory.

The achievements of black Americans Woodruff and fellow gold medalist Jesse Owens put the lie to Hitler's professions that he led a "master race."

Seventy years later, the sturdy oak that is dressed this month in bright gold leaves shadows Connellsville's high school stadium and track as a reminder of the runner whose famed 9-foot stride carried him around the world.

"Now, we have a wonderful memento to remember him. He gave us pride and helped our community so much," said Connellsville Mayor Judy Reed.

Woodruff, who suffered from multiple health problems that resulted in partial amputations of his legs several years ago, died Tuesday in Fountain Hills, Ariz., where he made his home with his wife, Rose. He was 92.

Word of Woodruff's death saddened, but did not shock, Pitt track coach Alonzo Webb, who met the athlete last year during the university's 70th anniversary tribute to Woodruff's gold medal victory in the 800-meter run.

"I was so glad to meet him. It made my life, I think, because I'm a track-and-field person," Webb said. "Even before I met him, I'd see pictures of those long legs and his strides. I watched clips of him and the way he ran that race."

During the Pitt event, Webb had dinner with Woodruff and his wife, and son, John Jr. He said Woodruff was a "great motivator" who offered encouragement and talked to him about the university's teams.

He described Woodruff, despite his advancing age, as a "sharp, bright man who was amazing to talk to" and knowledgeable about current events.

"He was in a wheelchair because of his legs, and he was using oxygen, but it sure didn't do anything to his spirit," Webb said. "He never even brought it up about his legs."

"Even in his wheelchair, you could tell the spirit of an athlete was still in him," said Robert Hill, Pitt's vice chancellor for public affairs. "His comment about it was, he would rather have lost his legs and kept his mind than lost his mental facilities and kept his legs."

Amen to that, Brother.

Woodruff's powerful legs -- and that celebrated stride -- earned him the nickname "Long John" and carried him across the finish line to capture one of the few gold medals that track and field teammate Owens did not own in Berlin.

It was a race for the history books.

Woodruff, who was favored going into the 800-meter contest, stunned spectators when he stopped running to avoid being boxed in by his opponents. When they passed him, he picked up the pace and stormed past his rivals to the finish line.

His storied run came just a year after his graduation from Connellsville High School, where he had set records in track competitions at the school, county, district and state levels. Connellsville business owners helped him obtain an athletic scholarship at Pitt, where he earned a degree in sociology in 1939.

He later donated his Olympic gold medal to Pitt, where it is displayed with his other track medals and his Olympic sweater.

Woodruff earned a master's degree in sociology from New York University and went on to serve in the Army in World War II and the Korean War. In 1957, he achieved the rank of lieutenant colonel.

Thank you for your service, sir.

He lived in New Jersey for a number of years and spent much of his career in New York, where he taught in the city's public schools and worked as an investigator for the New York Department of Welfare and as a state parole officer.

But he never forgot Connellsville, the city that greeted him with a parade attended by 10,000 people upon his return from the Olympics.

He often visited the city in July for the annual John Woodruff 5K Run and Walk, a race that celebrated its 25th anniversary this year. He attended the event up until a few years ago, when poor circulation and complications from a broken hip resulted in the loss of his legs from above the knees.

"He was quite a professional when he came here, and he has given us wonderful things to be proud of," Reed recalled.

"He was such a gracious gentleman."

Woodruff is survived by his wife, Rose; son, John Jr. of Brooklyn, N.Y.; daughter, Randilyn Gilliam of Chicago; five grandchildren; and three great-grandchildren.

A memorial service will be held at 11 a.m. Saturday at the Fountain View Village Independent Chapel. Later, a memorial service will be held near the oak tree in Connellsville.

Another dumbass list from Perfidious Albion.

After the list of top geniuses in the world, we get the Telegraphl's list of the 100 most influential "conservatives" in the USA.

WorldNetDaily: Chuck Norris makes list of most influential conservatives

Obviously, the voters saw that episode of Walker Texas Ranger in which Chuck beat the living daylights out of a black criminal, which is every conservative's #1 fantasy.

WND columnist Chuck Norris, fresh from an impressive endorsement of darkhorse presidential candidate Mike Huckabee that seemed to catapult him into front-runner status, was today listed as one of the most influential conservatives in the U.S. in a survey by the London Telegraph.

The paper is publishing lists of the 100 most influential conservatives and liberals over a period of five days. Today, numbers 61-80 were released, including Norris at 71 – ahead of such notables as Ann Coulter (84), Pat Buchanan (80) and Bill O'Reilly (82).

The paper noted Norris' endorsement of Huckabee last week in its explanation of the actor's appearance.

"One of those rare birds, a Hollywood conservative," wrote the Telegraph. "The martial artist and action star is a frequent financial contributor to Republican candidates and causes and recently declared his support for Mike Huckabee, a conservative Baptist minister, in 2008. An evangelical Christian, Norris has filled in for Sean Hannity as the conservative co-host on the Fox News talk show 'Hannity and Colmes."

Some finishing just ahead of Norris on the list were Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia (62), radio talk-show host Michael Savage (63) and economist Thomas Sowell (64).

Others below him on the list included Wall Street Journal columnist Peggy Noonan (83), Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas (85) and Col. Oliver North (92).

Here are the Telegraph's complete rankings:

Top conservatives: 1-20 21-40 41-60 61-80 81-100

In the interest of fairness, they also produced a list of the top left-fascist totalitarians of the middle:

Top left-fascist totalitarians of the middle: 1-20 21-40 41-60 61-80 81-100

Most folks on the latter list will be rounded up when Hitlery [Only #4!!! The once and future King Goober II is #1! Look for the Telegraph's office to get a cruise missle over the transom late in January 2009.] assumes her rightful place as Empress of the World.

The joy and sorrow of the revitalization of America's Steel City.

Pittsburgh Tribune-Review: Downtown Pittsburgh gets new condo
151 First Side is billed as the first new residential condominium built Downtown since 1968. About 80 percent of the 78 units have been sold.


WTAE: Downtown Pittsburgh Landmarks Candy-Rama, Headgear Will Be Gone Soon
Pittsburgh's urban redevelopers have ordered two longtime downtown stores, Candy-Rama and Headgear, to close to make way for apartments, new retail space and a fitness center.

One bad mutha of a challenge.

A real man takes on a former man who is now nothing more than a braying one-note jackass.

The Philadelphia Inquirer: Newly arrived, to face Murtha

A career Army member [Can you guess why they did not use the more common and less awkward "career soldier"? - F.G.] left the service two years short of retirement to move here and try his hand at politics by challenging longtime Democratic U.S. Rep. John P. Murtha.

First-time candidate William T. Russell, 45, a Republican, acknowledged that taking on a popular, 18-term congressman in the 2008 election would be "an uphill battle."

Russell plans to formally announce his candidacy within weeks. Murtha has declined to comment on the challenge.

Murtha, 75, has served in the House since 1974 and is known for bringing money and jobs - especially in the defense industries - to his district in rural Pennsylvania. A decorated Vietnam veteran and Marine Reserves colonel who previously had been hawkish on war issues, Murtha has criticized the Iraq war and pushed for the troops to be brought home. He became chairman of the House Defense Appropriations Subcommittee last year.

Instant translation: Congressthingee John "Bad Mutha" Murtha is an expert vote buyer.

Washington County Commissioner Diana Irey ran against Murtha last year, trying to capitalize on the backlash against Murtha's views among conservatives. She was soundly beaten in the general election.

Sadly, it works because most people gladly sell their freedom cheaply.

Russell, who moved from the Washington area to Murtha's district specifically to take on the congressman, has a long Army and Army Reserve career that includes tours of duty in the Balkans and both Iraq wars. He and his wife, Kasia, were in the Pentagon when a hijacked airliner slammed into the building on Sept. 11, 2001. Both escaped unhurt.

Murtha's call for troop withdrawal from Iraq "is just flat-out wrong," Russell said. Like Irey, Russell also criticized Murtha's public allegations that unnamed U.S. soldiers committed "cold-blooded murder and war crimes" against innocent Iraqi civilians in Haditha in 2005.

Charges that have since been proved false.

A small-business owner, Russell said he wants a local economy dependent on the free market. But he acknowledges some jobs may be lost if government contracts disappear.

It is not known whether Russell will have GOP challengers in the primary. Irey said she is focused on seeking reelection as commissioner.

Coming Dumbass Attractions. (And not the good, funny kind either, kiddies.)

Robert Zemeckis thought it would be a really cool idea to screw with the oldest written tale in English and make some money at the same time. The result is his excreble film Beowulf .

I suppose we should be thankful Jerry Bruckheimer did not have the same idea first.

Ditto the knuckleheads who turned the Battle of Thermopylae into a comic book and then a two hour long computerized cartoon.

Your best [and most intellectually honest] bet is to read the book, kiddies. If you need video, this one is less awful than some I have seen.

Mother of All Dumbass 'Holidays' Update.

Chicago Sun-Times: Halloween shoppers to break $5 billion mark

Shoppers will spend $5.07 billion this Halloween, up from $4.96 billion last year, according to the National Retail Federation. But fewer people will celebrate today -- 58.7 percent compared with 63.8 percent last year, the research showed.

Again, if you are older than 10 and you 'celebrate' Halloween, you are a dumbass.

It Takes A Village To Staff A Gestapo Unit Update. (Part Two)

The fascist AmericaLasters rush to defend Senatrix Hitlery Schicklgruber (N-NY) against less heavily armed Democrasses* who dared react to the rumor ol' Hit has a vajayjay [See YouTube - Jimmy Kimmel's Monologue - "Oprah's 'vajayjay'"- (Five minutes in. - F.G.) ] instead of a peepee.

*Nota bene: Hitlery's list of American Mensheviks grows ever longer.

Washington's other newspaper: Parsing the Polls: Clinton's Female Foundation

Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton (N.Y) was under attack throughout Tuesday night's Democratic debate in Philadelphia, valiantly fighting off some of the hits landed by her opponents, but also getting knocked off her balance by a few.

Our gal [?] Hit is obviously polishing her Amazon Warritrix credentials to take on the noted CINO Mayor McTerror.

Senator Token Update.

Ol' Middle Name Hussein is now second in the Veep sweepstakes to the token Latina candidate Bill Richardson, thanks to bonehead moves like this.

Roto-Reuters: Obama chides Clinton for playing gender card

Democrat Barack Obama, the only black candidate for president, accused rival Hillary Clinton on Friday of hiding behind her gender after she was pummeled in a debate with six male candidates.

BTW, the word in your feeble vocabulary for which you were grasping is "SEX", you fool, not "gender". Since you obviously do not know what the word "gender" means, you should stop using it.

It Takes A Village To Staff A Gestapo Unit Update. (Part One)

Washington's other newspaper: Votes and Vows: The Marriage Of King Goober II and Hitlery

Sally Bedell Smith retells the Schicklgruber marital tale with a twist that soothes the chord of unease it strikes in American women. [Learn it, love it, live it, ladies: Infidelity is fine as long as you are left-fascist. - F.G.] Her premise is in the title: Hitlery stayed with Spill "For Love of Politics."

Instant translation: They are both power-mad fascists who will do anything to rule.

How did New Delhi beat out Vegas for this one?

AP: World Toilet Summit gets down to business in New Delhi

Though it includes such ideas as a solar-powered commode that runs without water, the 2007 World Toilet Summit is no bathroom novelty show.

Let us get the jokes out of the way quickly, kiddies.

Participants at New Delhi's four-day gathering of experts, toilet aficionados, and even royalty from 44 countries are grappling with health and sanitation issues that endanger almost one-third of the world's people who don't have toilets.

"Toilet aficionados"?

The United Nations estimates there are some 2.6 billion people without access to basic sanitation, over half living in India and China, a stark reminder of the challenges facing these developing nations despite their recent rampant economic growth.

No! Not The World's Biggest Democracy!

Slave China I can understand.

"In India there are 700 million people who do not have access to safe and hygienic toilets. The waterborne diseases this causes kill 500,000 children every year, mostly from diarrhea," said Bindeshwar Pathak, the head of the Sulabh Sanitation and Social Reform Movement.

The theme of the seventh annual toilet summit _ co-hosted by Pathak's group, the Indian government and the Singapore-based World Toilet Organization _ is reaching the U.N.'s goal of halving the number of people living without water and sanitation by 2015.

The bottom line, as usual in this kind of story, is a dearth of freedom. That means poor people have less capitalism and less truly representative government than they need to live with dignity.

I'll bet $20 you will not hear that at this summit.

With India hosting the event, it also focused on a unique local problem.

Euphemistically known as "night soil workers," an estimated 500,000 people _ most of them "untouchables" from the lowest rungs of India's complex caste system _ still work cleaning out human excrement from dry latrines.

Free the People!

If you still suffer under the delusion that living in this sort of grinding poverty is somehow more noble than being a bourgeois First-Worlder, read the next four paragraphs, you socialist pinheads.

"I was married when I was 10-years-old, since then I have been doing this work," said Usha Chaumar, 30, a woman from the western state of Rajasthan describing how she would descend into the latrine pits early in the morning and carry out the fresh waste in a bucket on her head.

Chaumar would clean 15-to-20 of these latrines daily, paid 10 rupees (US$ 0.25 ; euro 0.17) per toilet per month.

"The people would throw the money on the floor so they would not have to touch me," said Chaumar who is now in a training program run by the Sulabh group to change her hereditary profession.

For generations, the caste-system's strict social order dictated what work people did, who they married, where they lived and even who they shared a meal with. For "untouchables" like Chaumar it meant a life doing what her ancestors had done and the diseases that accompany it.

"Now I am not untouchable, I am also a person, a good person," she said, talking about her business selling pickles and her new life attending summits with royalty and presidents.

Dutch Crown Prince Willem-Alexander who chairs the U.N. secretary-general's advisory board on water and sanitation, was the guest of honor at the summit, while former Indian President A.P.J. Abdul Kalam opened the event.

India's Rural Development Minister Raghvansh Prasad Singh told the conference that India was investing US$3.45 billion (euro2.4 billion) in sanitation projects including rehabilitation and self employment schemes for people like Chaumar.

Part of the problem is building expensive sewage systems in remote rural areas with scarce water supplies.

"Sewage systems are essentially 19th century technology, we need modern solutions," said Pathak.

That is where toilets like the one being promoted by the company African Sanitation come in. Pioneered for the slums of southern Africa, it requires no plumbing, no water and almost no maintenance.

Once a week a tray below is emptied of waste, now turned into an almost odorless compost by a solar heater and natural bacteria.

Talking to the toilet experts _ including a group of deeply earnest 12-year-old Indian school children who spend their weekends working with their school's "sanitation club" _ can be a sometimes-surreal expedition through technical aspects of personal hygiene and cultural differences inherent at a global toilet summit.

As African Sanitation's Lukas Oosthuizen discovered, their model needed a minor addition of a water tray to the design before it could be effectively deployed in India.

"We discovered that people here are washers, not wipers," he said.

Ol' Scratch is wearing a sweater this week, kiddies...

...'cause Kansas is favored by 17.5 over Nebraska in gridiron football.

Coach, it is time to leave the team and get your house in order.

Sports Illustrated: Andy Reid's son sentenced to jail

Philadelphia Eagles coach Andy Reid's drug-addicted, eldest son was sentenced Thursday to up to 23 months in jail for smashing into another motorist's car while high on heroin.


AP: Judge critical of Andy Reid's home

A football injury at age 14 introduced potent painkillers to the middle son of Philadelphia Eagles coach Andy Reid and he said in court that he's been lost in their grip ever since.

Sport is dying.

AP: Hingis retires after positive coke test

Martina Hingis revealed she tested positive for cocaine at Wimbledon, proclaimed her innocence and retired from tennis for a second time — all in one fell swoop. It was a swift and stunning end to a career highlighted by five Grand Slam singles titles and a rise to the top of the rankings at 16, the youngest No. 1 ever.

[heavy sigh] Once upon a time...

Saint of the Day and daily Mass readings.

Today is The Commemoration of All the Faithful Departed (or The Feast of All Souls). Please pray for all the poor souls in Pugatory, especially those who have been forgotten. Your prayers will help them on their way to the Glory of Heaven.


Today's first reading is Wisdom 3:1-9.
Today's Responsorial Psalm is Psalms 26:1, 4, 7-9, 13-14.
Today's second reading is Romans 5:5-11.
Today's Gospel reading is John 11:17-27.


Everyday links:

The Blessed Virgin Mary
The Rosary
Our Mother of Perpetual Help
Prayers from EWTN
National Coalition of Clergy and Laity (dedicated to action for a genuine Catholic Restoration)
The Catholic Calendar Page for Today
ZENIT - The World Seen From Rome


Just in case you are wondering what exactly Catholics believe, here is

The Apostles Creed

I believe in God, the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and earth; and in Jesus Christ, His only Son Our Lord, Who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and was buried.He descended into Hell; the third day He rose again from the dead; He ascended into Heaven, and sitteth at the right hand of God, the Father almighty; from thence He shall come to judge the living and the dead.I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body and life everlasting. Amen.


Memorare

Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that any one who fled to thy protection, implored thy help or sought thy intercession,was left unaided.Inspired with this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of virgins my Mother; to thee do I come, before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful; O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy clemency hear and answer me. Amen.


St. Joseph, her most chaste spouse, pray for us.


Anima Christi

Soul of Christ, sanctify me; Body of Christ, save me; Blood of Christ, inebriate me; Water from Christ's side, wash me; Passion of Christ, strengthen me; O good Jesus, hear me; Within Thy wounds hide me; Suffer me not to be separated from Thee; From the malicious enemy defend me; In the hour of my death call me; And bid me come unto Thee; That I may praise Thee with Thy saints and with Thy angels Forever and ever. Amen.


Prayer to St. Anthony, Martyr of Desire

Dear St. Anthony, you became a Franciscan with the hope of shedding your blood for Christ. In God's plan for you, your thirst for martyrdom was never to be satisfied. St. Anthony, Martyr of Desire, pray that I may become less afraid to stand up and be counted as a follower of the Lord Jesus. Intercede also for my other intentions. (Name them.)


Prayer To Saint Michael The Archangel

St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil; may God rebuke him, we humbly pray, and do thou O Prince of the heavenly hosts, by the divine power, thrust into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.


Prayer to End Abortion

Lord God, I thank You today for the gift of my life, and for the lives of all my brothers and sisters. I know there is nothing that destroys more life than abortion, yet I rejoice that you have conquered death by the resurrection of Your Son. I am ready to do my part to end abortion. Today I commit myself never to be silent, never to be passive, and never to be forgetful of the unborn. I commit myself to be active in the pro-life movement, and never stop defending life until all my brothers and sisters are protected and our nation once again becomes a nation with liberty and justice, not just for some, but for all. Through Christ our Lord. Amen.


Prayer For Vocations

Send forth your Spirit, Lord, into the hearts of your faithful people, that we may be conscious of our vocation to holiness and sevice to others. Grant that many of us may dedicate ourselves to You through the priesthood and the religious life.We pray especially for the needs of our own parish and diocese. Grant that we may always have sufficient good and holy priests, and dedicated Sisters to serve our commumities.We pray, too, for religious orders; that generous men may join them to become zealous missionaries in preaching the Gospel in word and action, especially to the poor and abandoned.We make this prayer through Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Redeemer. Amen.


Prayer Before The Crucifix

Behold, O kind and gentle Jesus, I kneel before Thee and pray that Thou would impress upon my heart the virtues of faith, hope, and charity, with true repentance for my sins and a firm purpose of amendment. At the same time, with sorrow I meditate on Thy five precious wounds, having in mind the words which David spoke in prophecy: "They have pierced my hands and my feet. I can count all my bones."


Divine Praises

Blessed be God.
Blessed be His Holy Name.
Blessed be Jesus Christ, true God and true Man.
Blessed be the Name of Jesus.
Blessed be His most Sacred Heart.
Blessed be His most Precious Blood.
Blessed be Jesus in the most Holy Sacrament of the Altar.
Blessed be the Holy Spirit, the Paraclete.
Blessed be the great Mother of God, Mary most holy.
Blessed be her holy and Immaculate Conception.
Blessed be her glorious Assumption.
Blessed be the name of Mary, Virgin and Mother.
Blessed be Saint Joseph, her most chaste spouse.
Blessed be God in His angels and in His saints.
May the Heart of Jesus in the most Blessed Sacrament
Be praised, adored and loved
With grateful affection at every moment
In all the tabernacles of the world
Even to the end of time. Amen.


Prayer to Saint Benedict

Sanctissime Confessor Domini, monachorum Pater et dux,
Benedicte, intercede pro nostra omniumque salute.

V. Domine Deus virtutum converte nos.

R. Et ostende faciem tuam et salvi erimus.


Oremus.


Excita, Domine, in Ecclesia tua Spiritum cui beatus Pater noster Benedictus Abbas servivit: ut eodem nos repleti, studeamus amare quod amavit, et opere exercere quod docuit.

Da nobis, quaesumus, Domine, perseverantem in tua voluntate famulatum: ut in
Diebus nostris et merito et numero populus tibi serviens augeatur. Per Christum Dominum Nostrum. Amen.


For those whose Latin is a bit rusty:

O most holy Confessor of the Lord, Benedict, father and guide of monks, intercede for our salvation and that of everyone.

V. Lord, God of armies, convert us.

R. Show us Thy Face and we shall be saved.


Let us pray.

Awaken, O Lord, in Thy Church the Spirit that our blessed Father Saint Benedict
obeyed, so that, filled with the same Spirit we may strive to love what he loved and practice what he taught.

Grant us the grace to persevere in the service of Thy will, so that our days may
see the people of Thy servants grow in merit and number. Through Christ Our Lord. Amen.

False alarm. The Morlocks are not REPEAT NOT on their way.

I know, I know. It was fun while it lasted.

PhysOrg: Debunking The Commercial Press and Why Scientists Hate to Talk to the Media

The popular press ran a story over the weekend about the eventual split into two species of the human race. The sources cited were the preeminent London School of Economics and the work of Professor Oliver Curry. The story published as scientific fact is rebuked by Dr. Curry and this article explains how it all happened.

A wildly interesting story about the eventual division of mankind into two species by the year 3000 caught my eye over the weekend. The story originally published by the Daily Mail authored by Niall Firth on October 26, 2007 provided astounding predictions for the future of mankind. It was also given a top position in the American news index Drudgereport. The Daily Mail story has graphic displays of the evolution of mankind and film clips of the classic work by H.G. Wells, The Time Machine.

Eek! Morlocks!

Further, the story piqued my interest because the sources cited were from the eminent London School of Economics. Specifically, a professor, Oliver Curry who received his PHD from the London School of Economics. His dissertation concerns Morality as Natural History: An adaptationist account of ethics, published in 2005. In essence Professor Curry interests are about values and attitudes and where do they come from.

He is a research associate affiliated with the Centre for Philosophy and Natural and Social Sciences. He is a member of the Darwin@LSE group. He currently teaches Political Theory at New York University in London.

The Daily Mail article stated in pertinent part:

"The alarming prediction comes from evolutionary theorist Oliver Curry from the London School of Economics, who says that the human race will have reached its physical peak by the year 3000."

"These humans will be between 6ft and 7ft tall and they will live up to 120 years."

"Physical features will be driven by indicators of health, youth and fertility that men and women have evolved to look for in potential mates," says the report, which suggests that advances in cosmetic surgery and other body modifying techniques will effectively homogenize our appearance."

"Men will have symmetrical facial features, deeper voices and bigger penises, according to Curry in a report commissioned for men satellite TV channel Bravo."

Insert male genitalia joke here.

"Women will all have glossy hair, smooth hairless skin, large eyes and pert breasts, according to Curry."

Curry, you bastard, stop teasing us!

"Racial differences will be a thing of the past as interbreeding produces a single coffee-coloured skin tone."

Well that is just racist.

"The future for our descendants is a long life, perfect bodies and chiseled features, however, while humans will reach their peak in 1000 years´time, 10,000 years later our reliance on technology will have begun to dramatically change our appearance."

"Medicine will weaken our immune system and we will begin to appear more child-like. [Here is where the pedophiles started drooling. - F.G.] Dr Curry said: The report suggests that the future of man will be a story of the good, the bad and the ugly."

I read these astonishing predictions from an eminent professor educated at the preeminent London School of Economics and something looked fishy. It was enough to make anyone take notice. As it turns out selling papers and hyping an upcoming Bravo episode was the purpose of the article. It was not to educate the public at all.

Surprise! I, for one, am totally shocked.

In fact Dr. Curry has renounced any conclusions or misapplications of his work on the evolution of values, moral choices and the like. He is currently awaiting publication of his recent research, Patience is a Virtue: cooperative people have lower discount rates.

What?

Read the title of that research paper a couple of more times, kiddies. I suspect Dr. Curry's words are often "misinterpreted".

In response to the press releases mentioned in the Daily Mail article, Dr. Curry released the following explanation on October 17, 2007.

"In the summer of 2006 I was commissioned by Bravo Television to write an essay on the future of human evolution. The essay was intended as a science fiction way of illustrating some aspects of evolutionary theory."

"Bravo then sent out a press release on the essay, but did not release the essay itself. As a result, a wildly distorted version of what I had written ended up being reported as science fact in the media. I do not endorse the content of these media reports."

To read the original essay, please see below.

In essence Dr. Curry was asked to write a fictional account of what if and make some projections about some 1,000 years in the future for an episode of a popularized series on Bravo. He never intended that his Essay for Bravo be presented as scientific evidence. An examination of the quotes made in the Daily Mail article referring to a report confuses the peer review research he is conducting and an entertaining essay he never intended to have published as scientific evidence. His words and work are taken out of context.

Sure. He probably intends to lead an army of the brutes against La Schicklgruber [who will still be alive thanks to her voracious consumption of babies.] and the other beautiful Eloi.

Is it any wonder scientists and academics are skeptical of the popular media. In this instance, Bravo knew the basis of the Essay, it was for entertainment. The Daily Mail and other popular news services saw fit to publish a highly sensational headline that failed to mention the context of the words and works.

I would like to think Dr. Curry gets it...

See: http://homepage.mac.com/scottukgb/publications/bravo.pdf

Ivan Castro, American Hero.

Washington's other newspaper: Blinded First Lieutenant Proves He 'Can Do This'

It wasn't 1st Lt. Ivan Castro's eyesight, which he lost in Iraq more than a year ago, that knocked him off his pace yesterday at the Marine Corps Marathon. It was his sighted guides.
"His first two guides were women," said George Mannes, who held Castro's left arm as he crossed the finish line in 4 hours 14 minutes 10 seconds. "They both had to make bathroom stops."

Chicks.

I'll bet they went together.

But Castro, 40, was just happy to make it to the finish line. This was only his second marathon and the first since being blinded 1 year 1 month 26 days ago. He easily rattled the number off the top of his head.

"I've got a standard now," Castro said. "I've got a goal to beat next year. This is not the last. This is just the first. You're going to see more of Ivan Castro."

Amen to that, Brother.

Castro, an Army infantry officer stationed in Fort Bragg, N.C., was blinded when his convoy was attacked while on a rooftop in Baghdad. He and two other soldiers were dodging mortars when one hit right in front of him, knocking him unconscious and instantly causing blindness in his right eye. Surgery to remove shrapnel claimed his left eye. The blast killed the other two soldiers.

May God have mercy on their brave souls.

To: Those with IQs over that of a radish
Re: The last paragraph

No, it is not you, kiddies. The convoy was not on the roof. Washington's other newspaper hires according to a reporter's doctrinal orthodoxy, not his ability to write and speak proper English.

The Carter Syndrome* spreads among our moral and intellectual superiors.

Sydney Morning Herald: Democrat candidate saw UFO

In the United States election campaign's most startling revelation yet, a Democratic congressman running for president said he once saw a UFO over the home of the actor Shirley MacLaine.

Even in Australia, that cow must be called an actress.

Dennis Kucinich was asked during a Democratic presidential debate in Philadelphia on Tuesday about the claim in a book by MacLaine, quoted in US media in advance of publication.
"I did," Mr Kucinich said, to laughter from the audience.

Left unclear were details of the alleged sighting in Washington state, during which MacLaine says the politician saw a silent, triangular craft and "felt a connection in his heart and heard directions in his mind".

"It was an unidentified flying object, OK? It's, like, it's unidentified. I saw something," Mr Kucinich said during the debate by seven Democrats hoping to win the party's nomination to run for president next year.

Not missing a beat, the congressman from Ohio claimed that "more people in this country have seen UFOs than I think approve of George Bush's presidency". But the debate's co-host, Tim Russert of NBC television, cited data that only 14 per cent of Americans say they have seen a UFO. Mr Bush's approval ratings are in the mid-30 per cent range.

As for Mr Kucinich, polls show 1 per cent of likely Democratic voters want to see the former Cleveland mayor and fervent opponent of the Iraq war run for president. His campaign slogan: Strength through Peace.

Strength Through Joy is more like it. [The Nazi does not fall far from the tree, kiddies.]

*Before we know it, Hitlery will be taken up to that great Nuremberg Rally [or is that Trial?] in the sky.

Health Nazis grab Nebraska newborn.

Arizona Daily Star: Lawsuit says seizure of newborn for blood tests violated Nebraska couple's rights

A Nebraska couple sued state health officials Thursday, arguing their rights were violated when their newborn baby was seized by sheriff's deputies so a mandatory blood test could be performed.

Joel Anaya, who was almost 6 weeks old, was kept in foster care for six days until the tests came back negative earlier this month.

His parents, Mary and Josue Anaya, believe that the Bible instructs against deliberately drawing blood and that ignoring that directive may shorten a person's life. State health officials "conspired to deny the Anayas their rights of due process, and to seize and test baby Joel without notice or a hearing in district court," according to the filed in U.S. District Court in Omaha.

Kooky but protected, kiddies.

"This is a classic case of the government overreaching and violating a family's constitutional rights," said Jeff Downing, the couple's attorney.

The Anaya family is not seeking damages, but they want to ensure that this won't happen again if they have more children.

It's the first time in Nebraska a child was taken from parents to draw the drops of blood from the baby's heel for the screening, said Marla Augustine, spokeswoman for the state Department of Health and Human Services. Nebraska is one of four states — South Dakota, Michigan and Montana are the others — that doesn't offer a religious exemption for parents who don't want the test performed.

1] The child was not being endangered by his parents.

2] What happens when NebrasKKKa finds a baby with a disease? It hands pamphlets to the parents.

3] Any bets on how long before these [and other] tests are mandated for children in their mothers' wombs? Do you doubt a positive test will get "defectives" aborted?

Health officials say the newborn screening program is one of the state's most cost-effective public health programs. The newborn blood test — usually performed within 48 hours of birth — screens for dozens of rare diseases, some of which can cause severe mental retardation or death if left undetected.

Last year, out of 26,819 babies tested, 537 tested positive for one of the dozens of diseases, and 43 of those results were confirmed, according to the state's Newborn Screening Program.

Augustine said Thursday that state officials had not seen the lawsuit and would have no comment.

The decision to seize Joel Anaya and test him was made by Douglas County prosecutors who have said they only did what was necessary to protect the baby's health.

When the Anayas' daughter Rosa was born in 2003, a hearing was held in Douglas County District Court and the couple voiced their objections. The state Supreme Court eventually turned down their arguments, but Rosa never was tested.

This time, the county wanted to make sure the testing was completed, said Nicole Brundo Goaley, a deputy Douglas County Attorney. So the county got an order from a juvenile court judge to test the baby.

Sheriff's deputies came Oct. 11 to take the child, who remained in foster care until tests came back Oct. 16. During that period, social workers let Mary Anaya nurse her son several times a day.

BUSH KEEPS SLAUGHTERING G.I.s WHOLESALE...

...oops, never mind.

Denver Post: Sharp drop in Iraq deaths seen
Violent deaths of U.S. troops and Iraqi civilians appear to have fallen sharply in Iraq in October, according to the latest Associated Press tally.

News 24 South Africa: Iraq deaths drop to new low
Civilian and US military deaths in Iraq have fallen to their lowest level this year, bolstering the US assertion that a troop surge is reducing bloodshed.

Guardian Unlimited: US Iraq deaths lowest in 18 months
Death toll for US combat troops in Iraq dropped sharply last month in trend Pentagon claims shows 'surge' strategy is working.

America's McPaper hid this story on Page 5A...

USA Today: U.S. death toll in Iraq lower in October
The monthly toll of U.S. service members who have died in Iraq is on track to being the lowest in nearly two years, with at least 37 troop deaths recorded as of Tuesday, but the military cautioned it's too early to declare a long-term trend.

Another science-related tragedy.

National Geographic: Longest-lived animal found, then killed -- Clam was 405

A clam dredged from icy Arctic waters is being hailed as the world's longest-lived animal.
Climate researchers at Bangor University in the United Kingdom recently counted 405 annual growth rings in the shells of a quahog clam.

When this animal was young, Shakespeare was writing his greatest plays and the English were establishing their first settlements in the Americas.

The team plucked the mollusk from 262-feet-deep (80-meter-deep) waters off the northern coast of Iceland.

The team is studying growth lines in clam shells as part of a project to understand how the climate has changed over the past thousand years.

Another victim of the Heat Nazis!

"On a side note, we discovered this very old clam," said Al Wanamaker, a postdoctoral researcher at the university.

Quahog clams are known for their longevity.

A 220-year-old taken from American waters in 1982 holds the official Guinness Book of World Records oldest animal title. Unofficially, the record belongs to a 374-year-old Icelandic clam housed in a German museum.

The new clam is at least 30 years older, according to the Bangor University team. The animal died when the researchers counted its rings.

Curiosity killed the clam.

"There's probably many others that are actually quite older—we just haven't found them yet," Wanamaker said.

Or killed them...

Justice smacks down some false believers.

A jury in Maryland showed some sense for a change...

Albuquerque Tribune: Jury awards Westboro Baptist Church to pay Marine dad $11 million

It is a shame we cannot throw these cretinous clowns in prison for the rest of their lives...

Members of a fundamentalist Kansas church ordered to pay nearly $11 million in damages to a grieving father smiled as they walked out of the courtroom, vowing that the verdict would not deter them from protesting at military funerals.

"Absolutely, don't you understand this was an act in futility?" said Shirley Phelps-Roper, whose father founded the Westboro Baptist Church.

Members promised to picket future funerals with placards bearing such slogans as "Thank God for dead soldiers" and "God hates fags."

They believe that U.S. deaths in the Iraq war are punishment for the nation's tolerance of homosexuality. They say they are entitled to protest at funerals under the First Amendment, which guarantees freedom of speech and religion.

Albert Snyder sued the Topeka, Kan., church after a protest last year at the funeral of his son, Marine Lance Cpl. Matthew Snyder, who was killed in Iraq. He claimed the protests intruded upon what should have been a private ceremony and sullied his memory of the event.

A jury agreed. On Wednesday, the church and three of its leaders - Fred Phelps and his two daughters, Phelps-Roper and Rebekah Phelps-Davis - were found liable for invasion of privacy and intent to inflict emotional distress.

Jurors awarded Snyder $2.9 million in compensatory damages and $8 million in punitive damages.

It's unclear whether Snyder will be able to collect the damages.

The assets of the church and the defendants are less than a million dollars, mainly in homes, cars and retirement accounts, defense attorney Jonathan Katz said. The church has about 75 members and is funded by tithing.

Take their damn 401(k)s!

The attorney had urged jurors to award damages that would send a message to the church: "Do not bring your circus of hate to Maryland again."

Craig Trebilcock, one of Snyder's lawyers, later called the verdict "Judgment Day for the Westboro Baptist Church."

"They're always talking about other people's Judgment Day. Well, this is theirs," he said.

Snyder sobbed when he heard the verdict, while members of the church greeted the news with tightlipped smiles.

They are confident the award will be overturned on appeal, Phelps said.

"Oh, it will take about five minutes to get that thing reversed," he said.

May God have mercy on their pathetic souls.

It Takes A Village To Staff A Gestapo Unit Update.

Former nazi financier Peter Paul still has not learned you do not cross the Schicklgrubers. Look for his lifeless body to be found near the Mena airport.

Independent Online: Anti-Clinton video finding a niche on the Net

A stinging 13-minute video by a bitter foe of presidential candidate Senator Hillary Clinton and her husband, Bill, the former president, is finding a wide Internet audience.

The clip, a preview of a longer film by one-time Clinton donor Peter Paul, has scored more than 1,4-million hits on Google Video and about 350 000 on YouTube during the past week. Its popularity has driven it to the top spot on Google Video over the past two weeks, and it is the most-viewed political YouTube video in Britain.

Paul is a Hollywood entrepreneur, former partner of Spider-Man creator Stan Lee and convicted felon, who has sued the Clintons over a celebrity-packed fundraiser he helped organise for her 2000 Senate race. A California appeals court ruled this month that Senator Clinton should be dismissed from the suit.

Saint of the Day and daily Mass readings.

Today is All Saints Day. Pray for us, all you angels and saints.


Today's first reading is Revelation 7:2-4, 9-14.
Today's Responsorial Psalm is Psalm 23:1-6.
Today's second reading is 1 John 3:1-3.
Today's Gospel reading is Matthew 5:1-12.


Everyday links:

The Blessed Virgin Mary
The Rosary
Our Mother of Perpetual Help
Prayers from EWTN
National Coalition of Clergy and Laity (dedicated to action for a genuine Catholic Restoration)
The Catholic Calendar Page for Today
ZENIT - The World Seen From Rome


Just in case you are wondering what exactly Catholics believe, here is

The Apostles Creed

I believe in God, the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and earth; and in Jesus Christ, His only Son Our Lord, Who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and was buried.He descended into Hell; the third day He rose again from the dead; He ascended into Heaven, and sitteth at the right hand of God, the Father almighty; from thence He shall come to judge the living and the dead.I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body and life everlasting. Amen.


Memorare

Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that any one who fled to thy protection, implored thy help or sought thy intercession,was left unaided.Inspired with this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of virgins my Mother; to thee do I come, before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful; O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy clemency hear and answer me. Amen.


St. Joseph, her most chaste spouse, pray for us.


Anima Christi

Soul of Christ, sanctify me; Body of Christ, save me; Blood of Christ, inebriate me; Water from Christ's side, wash me; Passion of Christ, strengthen me; O good Jesus, hear me; Within Thy wounds hide me; Suffer me not to be separated from Thee; From the malicious enemy defend me; In the hour of my death call me; And bid me come unto Thee; That I may praise Thee with Thy saints and with Thy angels Forever and ever. Amen.


Prayer to St. Anthony, Martyr of Desire

Dear St. Anthony, you became a Franciscan with the hope of shedding your blood for Christ. In God's plan for you, your thirst for martyrdom was never to be satisfied. St. Anthony, Martyr of Desire, pray that I may become less afraid to stand up and be counted as a follower of the Lord Jesus. Intercede also for my other intentions. (Name them.)


Prayer To Saint Michael The Archangel

St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil; may God rebuke him, we humbly pray, and do thou O Prince of the heavenly hosts, by the divine power, thrust into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.


Prayer to End Abortion

Lord God, I thank You today for the gift of my life, and for the lives of all my brothers and sisters. I know there is nothing that destroys more life than abortion, yet I rejoice that you have conquered death by the resurrection of Your Son. I am ready to do my part to end abortion. Today I commit myself never to be silent, never to be passive, and never to be forgetful of the unborn. I commit myself to be active in the pro-life movement, and never stop defending life until all my brothers and sisters are protected and our nation once again becomes a nation with liberty and justice, not just for some, but for all. Through Christ our Lord. Amen.


Prayer For Vocations

Send forth your Spirit, Lord, into the hearts of your faithful people, that we may be conscious of our vocation to holiness and sevice to others. Grant that many of us may dedicate ourselves to You through the priesthood and the religious life.We pray especially for the needs of our own parish and diocese. Grant that we may always have sufficient good and holy priests, and dedicated Sisters to serve our commumities.We pray, too, for religious orders; that generous men may join them to become zealous missionaries in preaching the Gospel in word and action, especially to the poor and abandoned.We make this prayer through Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Redeemer. Amen.


Prayer Before The Crucifix

Behold, O kind and gentle Jesus, I kneel before Thee and pray that Thou would impress upon my heart the virtues of faith, hope, and charity, with true repentance for my sins and a firm purpose of amendment. At the same time, with sorrow I meditate on Thy five precious wounds, having in mind the words which David spoke in prophecy: "They have pierced my hands and my feet. I can count all my bones."


Divine Praises

Blessed be God.
Blessed be His Holy Name.
Blessed be Jesus Christ, true God and true Man.
Blessed be the Name of Jesus.
Blessed be His most Sacred Heart.
Blessed be His most Precious Blood.
Blessed be Jesus in the most Holy Sacrament of the Altar.
Blessed be the Holy Spirit, the Paraclete.
Blessed be the great Mother of God, Mary most holy.
Blessed be her holy and Immaculate Conception.
Blessed be her glorious Assumption.
Blessed be the name of Mary, Virgin and Mother.
Blessed be Saint Joseph, her most chaste spouse.
Blessed be God in His angels and in His saints.
May the Heart of Jesus in the most Blessed Sacrament
Be praised, adored and loved
With grateful affection at every moment
In all the tabernacles of the world
Even to the end of time. Amen.


Prayer to Saint Benedict

Sanctissime Confessor Domini, monachorum Pater et dux,
Benedicte, intercede pro nostra omniumque salute.

V. Domine Deus virtutum converte nos.

R. Et ostende faciem tuam et salvi erimus.


Oremus.


Excita, Domine, in Ecclesia tua Spiritum cui beatus Pater noster Benedictus Abbas servivit: ut eodem nos repleti, studeamus amare quod amavit, et opere exercere quod docuit.

Da nobis, quaesumus, Domine, perseverantem in tua voluntate famulatum: ut in
Diebus nostris et merito et numero populus tibi serviens augeatur. Per Christum Dominum Nostrum. Amen.


For those whose Latin is a bit rusty:

O most holy Confessor of the Lord, Benedict, father and guide of monks, intercede for our salvation and that of everyone.

V. Lord, God of armies, convert us.

R. Show us Thy Face and we shall be saved.


Let us pray.

Awaken, O Lord, in Thy Church the Spirit that our blessed Father Saint Benedict
obeyed, so that, filled with the same Spirit we may strive to love what he loved and practice what he taught.

Grant us the grace to persevere in the service of Thy will, so that our days may
see the people of Thy servants grow in merit and number. Through Christ Our Lord. Amen.

You want to dominate THIS list?

Daily Telegraph: British brains dominate list of living geniuses

Britain has more living geniuses per head of population than anywhere else in the world, according to a new survey which reveals the country's influence on science, technology, business and the arts.

Almost a quarter of those featured in the list of 100 living geniuses are Britons, including Sir Tim Berners-Lee, who invented the world wide web, [Al Gore, call your lawyer's office. - F.G.] in joint first place, and physicist Stephen Hawking at seven in the list.

British artists and musicians feature heavily, including Brit Art leader Damien Hirst at number 15, poet Seamus Heaney at 26, playwright Harold Pinter at 31, Sir Paul McCartney at 58, David Bowie at 67, Harry Potter author JK Rowling at 83 and filmmaker Ken Russell at 100.

Sir Richard Branson, the head of Virgin Group, at 49, chimpanzee expert Jane Goodall, at 58, and psychologist Dorothy Rowe, at 72, also made the list.

With 24 Britons in the list, the country has generated one living genius per 2.5 million people – a higher proportion than any other country.

The list, compiled by a panel of six experts in creativity and innovation, is jointly topped by Sir Tim and Albert Hofmann, the Swiss scientist who created the drug LSD.

They are followed by George Soros, the American financier and philanthropist, Matt Groening, creator of The Simpsons and Nelson Mandela, the former South African president.

There are also some surprise entrants. Osama Bin Laden ranks at number 43, a spot he shares with Bill Gates, the Microsoft founder and Mohammed Ali, the former world heavyweight boxing champion.

The Americans have 43 geniuses on the list – one per 6.9 million people.

Creators Synectics, a global consultants firm, chose their geniuses by awarding scores out of 10 to each entrant against a number of factors: paradigm shifting; popular acclaim; intellectual power; achievement and cultural importance. The firm emailed 4,000 Britons this summer and asked them to nominate up to 10 living people who they considered geniuses.

They received back 1,100 nominations for individuals in all walks of life, more than 60 per cent of whom were either American or English. Only 60 per cent were still alive.

The panel was then charged with ranking the list in order of genius and to present a resulting shortlist of 100, who were then scored against the five factors.

Nigel Clarke, a managing partner of Synectics UK & Europe, said: "Many people argue that a genius can be defined by their contribution, where it turns conventional thinking on its head.

"I think that Albert Hoffman and Tim Berners-Lee have this in common with the great geniuses of the past.

''Both of them have, in their own way, turned the world that we live in upside down. And it may be that alone that accounts for their acclamation as the world's greatest living geniuses."


1] Albert Hoffman (Swiss)
Chemist

1] Tim Berners-Lee (British)
Computer Scientist

3] George Soros (American)
Investor & Philanthropist

This is as far as any sane man needs to go before realizing this is either a monumental joke or the work of a madman.

4] Matt Groening (American)
Satirist & Animator

I am no fan of Citizen Mandela, but the guy who created The Simpsons?

5] Nelson Mandela (South African)
Politician & Diplomat

5] Frederick Sanger (British)
Chemist

7] Dario Fo (Italian)
Writer & Dramatist

7] Steven Hawking (British)
Physicist

Hawking proves that a fat PR man is worth his weight in gold.

9] Oscar Niemeyer (Brazilian)
Architect

9] Philip Glass (American)
Composer

Glass is tied for ninth? That is just sick.

9] Grigory Perelman (Russian)
Mathematician

12] Andrew Wiles (British)
Mathematician

12] Li Hongzhi (Chinese)
Spiritual Leader

If Citizen Li is not out of Slave China yet, he better start running right now.

12] Ali Javan (Iranian)
Engineer

Same for ol' Ali. Unless he is the Father of the Iranian Bomb, of course. [Don't worry, kiddies, I checked. He is safely ensconced at MIT and is co-inventor of the gas laser.]

15] Brian Eno (British)
Composer

Oy vey!

15] Damian Hirst (British)
Artist

15] Daniel Tammet (British)
Savant & Linguist

18] Nicholson Baker (American)
Writer

Who?

19] Daniel Barenboim (N/A)
Musician

Nobody will claim him.

20] Robert Crumb (American)
Artist

Who's Harry Crumb?

20] Richard Dawkins (British)
Biologist and philosopher

20] Larry Page & Sergey Brin (American)
Publishers

20] Rupert Murdoch (American)
Publisher

Oh, no. He's Australian.

20] Geoffrey Hill (British)
Poet

BTW, there are too damn many ties in this list. Prove you have a pair and pick one!

25] Garry Kasparov (Russian)
Chess Player

Fyodor's endorsed candidate for President of Russia.

26] The Dalai Lama
(Tibetan)
Spiritual Leader

Brave, yes. But a genius?

26] Steven Spielberg
(American)
Film maker

Viva Spielbergo!

26] Hiroshi Ishiguro
(Japanese)
Roboticist


26] Robert Edwards
(British)
Pioneer of IVF treatment

In vitro, nobody can hear you scream...

26] Seamus Heaney (Irish)
Poet

31] Harold Pinter
(British)
Writer & Dramatist

Hee-hee!

32] Flossie Wong-Staal
(Chinese)
Bio-technologist

32] Bobby Fischer (American)
Chess Player

That is just mean.

32] Prince (American)
Musician

HOLY CRAP!

32] Henrik Gorecki (Polish)
Composer

32] Avram Noam Chomski
(American)
Philosopher & linguist

Noam is a commie. It does take a lot of cogitatin' power to reconcile that with one's conscience. Or a lot of booze.

32] Sebastian Thrun (German)
Probabilistic roboticist

32] Nima Arkani Hamed (Canadian)
Physicist

32] Margaret Turnbull
(American)
Astrobiologist

40] Elaine Pagels (American)
Historian

40] Enrique Ostrea (Philippino)
Pediatrics & neonatology

40] Gary Becker (American)
Economist

43] Mohammed Ali (American)
Boxer

Un-be-freakin'-lieveable.

43] Osama Bin Laden (Saudi)
Islamicist

Goat rape is brain food.

43] Bill Gates (American)
Businessman

It takes a genius to sterilize poor women.

43] Philip Roth
(American)
Writer

Dumbass.

43] James West
(American)
Invented the foil electrical microphone

That surely tops M. Ali [#43 above], who only invented the rope-a-dope.

43] Tuan Vo-Dinh (Vietnamese)
Bio-Medical Scientist

49] Brian Wilson (American)
Musician

Oh my. I do believe I just soiled myself.

49] Stevie Wonder (American)
Singer songwriter

It is about time.

49] Vint Cerf (American)
Computer scientist

49] Henry Kissinger (American)
Diplomat and politician

49] Richard Branson (British)
Publicist

49] Pardis Sabeti (Iranian)
Biological anthropologist

We seem to be stuck on 49, kiddies.

49] Jon de Mol (Dutch)
Television producer

49] Meryl Streep (American)
Actress

Kissinger is gonna be pissed.

49] Margaret Attwood (Canadian)
Writer

58] Placido Domingo (Spanish)
Singer

58] John Lasseter (American)
Digital Animator

58] Shunpei Yamazaki (Japanese)
Computer scientist & physicist

58] Jane Goodall (British)
Ethologist & Anthropologist

58] Kirti Narayan Chaudhuri (Indian)
Historian

58] John Goto (British)
Photographer

58] Paul McCartney (British)
Musician

He did get away with murdering one of his "wives", after all. And he portrayed the maimed one as a golddigger. Brilliant!

58] Stephen King (American)
Writer

Dumbass.

58] Leonard Cohen (American)
Poet & musician

Ditto.

67] Aretha Franklin (American)
Musician

Yes!

67] David Bowie (British)
Musician

Another example of British genius.

67] Emily Oster (American)
Economist

67] Steve Wozniak (American)
Engineer and co-founder of Apple Computers

67] Martin Cooper (American)
Inventor of the cell phone

Hmmm...

72] George Lucas (American)
Film maker

72] Niles Rogers (American)
Musician

Hee-hee!

72] Hans Zimmer (German)
Composer

72] John Williams (American)
Composer

72] Annette Baier (New Zealander)
Philosopher

My eyes are glazing over...

72] Dorothy Rowe (British)
Psychologist

72] Ivan Marchuk (Ukrainian)
Artist & sculptor

72] Robin Escovado (American)
Composer

72] Mark Dean (American)
Inventor & computer scientist

72] Rick Rubin (American)
Musician & producer

Please, make it stop!

72] Stan Lee (American)
Publisher

I love Marvel Comics, but Stan must be blushing from head to toe.

83] David Warren (Australian)
Engineer

83] Jon Fosse (Norwegian)
Writer & dramatist

83] Gjertrud Schnackenberg (American)
Poet

She is a genius because she can spell her own name.

83] Graham Linehan (Irish)
Writer & dramatist

83] JK Rowling (British)
Writer

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

83] Ken Russell (British)
Film maker

Blah, blah, blah...

83] Mikhail Timofeyevich Kalashnikov (Russian)
Small arms designer

Cheap, rugged automatic weapons for all the peasants. Definitely genius. Definitely Zardoz.

83] Erich Jarvis (American)
Neurobiologist

91] Chad Varah (British)
Founder of Samaritans

91] Nicolas Hayek (Swiss)
Businessman and founder of Swatch

91] Alastair Hannay (British)
Philosopher

94] Patricia Bath (American)
Ophthalmologist


94] Thomas A. Jackson (American)
Aerospace engineer

94] Dolly Parton (American)
Singer

Now the joke is exposed. Dolly is obviously #44...DD.

94] Morissey (British)
Singer

He's still alive?

94] Michael Eavis (British)
Organiser of Glastonbury

94] Ranulph Fiennes (British)
Adventurer

100] Quentin Tarantino (American)
Filmmaker

He has been promoted from everybody's third favorite foot fetishist to world's #100 genius. That's some serious marketing, baby.

Sport is dying.

The dumbasses' dumbass strikes again. At least Michelle Wie looks good when she pulls out...

CBS Sportsline: Daly does another disappearing act
John Daly was a big draw this week in the PGA Tour event at Port St. Lucie, Fla. One problem: After making the cut, Daly bails without explanation following the third round. Steve Elling says Daly's disappearing act is beyond tiresome.

Everyone's third favorite spokesthingee for melanin-rich females of the sporting persuasion apologizes for calling a pervert a pervert...

USA Today: Citing 'partial information,' Stringer apologizes to Thomas
New York Knicks coach Isiah Thomas and Rutgers women's basketball coach C. Vivian Stringer have made up after Stringer apologized to Thomas for critical comments she made Friday regarding the sexual harassment trial he and the team lost last month.

Et tu, Tyson?

Houston Chronicle: Arkansas track team loses two national titles
Arkansas' renowned track and field program lost two national championships Thursday when the NCAA imposed stiff sanctions for violations involving sprint star Tyson Gay and a former assistant coach. The Razorbacks also received three years' probation.

Triumph of the Gentlemen.

Winston-Salem Journal: Manning shows patience, poise in beating Panthers

No sane person would consider the Indianapolis Colts' 31-7 win over Carolina historic, but sanity took a holiday yesterday. Coach Tony Dungy broke Don Shula's franchise victory record, quarterback Peyton Manning broke Johnny Unitas' franchise record for touchdown passes...

Yes, Virginia, there really are martyrs among us.

Daily Mail: Austrian farmer executed by Nazis is beatified by the Catholic Church

An Austrian farmer beheaded by the Nazis in 1943 for deserting Hitler's army was beatified by the Roman Catholic Church in the last major step before his possible sainthood.

Cardinal Jose Saraiva Martins, prefect of the Vatican's Congregation for the Causes of Saints, presided over the ceremony in the northwestern city of Linz for Franz Jaegerstaetter.

Jaegerstaetter, who was declared a martyr in June by Pope Benedict XVI, was executed outside Berlin on Aug. 9, 1943 after the young farmer was arrested for desertion.

The devout believer and conscientious objector had been the only person in his village to vote against the creation of a "Greater Germany" shortly after Austria was annexed in 1938.

Jaegerstaetter's beatification gave Austrians a fresh opportunity to examine "our own wartime past: the war generation, inhumanity, and the terror of the Nazis," Austrian bishops Ludwig Schwarz and Manfred Scheuer said in a statement.

"He is a shining example in his fidelity to the claims of his conscience - an advocate of nonviolence and peace," they said, praising Jaegerstaetter for standing up to "the inhuman and godless system of Nazism."

In 1997, a Berlin court posthumously exonerated Jaegerstaetter, who was ordered to be put to death for treason after his request to be excused from regular army service for religious reasons was denied.

About 4,000 faithful and 30 crimson-robed bishops from Austria and abroad joined Jaegerstaetter's widow, Franziska, at Friday's ceremony, which was broadcast live on national television from Linz, about 200 kilometers (120 miles) west of Vienna.

"I always prayed to the Lord God that he would let me live to experience this day," said his widow, now 94.

The beatification was held on Austria's National Day holiday, which marks the anniversary of a 1955 law declaring the country to be neutral.

In its official biography of Jaegerstaetter, the Diocese of Linz says he had a dream in 1938 warning of the horrors of Hitler's regime to come.

"In it, he saw a train carrying innumerable people to perdition, and its meaning was unveiled to him as representing the Nazis," it says.

The Lord works in mysterious ways.

After World War II, two Franciscan nuns brought an urn containing Jaegerstaetter's ashes back to the province of Upper Austria, where he had long been celebrated as a martyr, meaning he died for the church.

Wrong. It means he died for God.

Last year, President Heinz Fischer named a park in honor of Jaegerstaetter in Hitler's birthplace of Branau am Inn - a town not far from where Jaegerstaetter himself was born in 1907.

Before he can be canonized, or named a saint, a miracle attributed to Jaegerstaetter still must be confirmed.

The process is complicated and usually takes decades, sometimes centuries.