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Love the First Amendment. It helps us spot the assholes from a safe distance.

Forget the high-minded principles of our Founding Fathers, kiddies. In the real world, letting the fascists, totalitarians, morons, psychopa...

"Let no freedom be allowed to novelty, because it is not fitting that any addition should be made to antiquity. Let not the clear faith and belief of our forefathers be fouled by any muddy admixture." -- Pope Sixtus III

Friday, October 13, 2006

I need more cowbell.

Christopher Walken, Blue Oyster Cult, and Will Ferrell? That's entertainment!


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Fyodor's Pro Football Picks of the Week.

1) The guys who set the lines are professionals. Their job is to make each game look as attractive as possible to everyone. That way they even out the amount of money bet on each side.

Instant translation: The house wins no matter who wins. That's why people get into the gambling business.

2) I am just a fan. I won't even keep track of these picks week to week if it gets too embarrassing.

3) There is no such thing as "inside information". Especially in the pros.

4) If those idiot touts on tv and in the paper were any good, they wouldn't go public with their genius. They'd sit at Harrah's sports book from open to close and then go out and buy $2,000 an hour hookers who dress like high school girls.

5) Gambling is stupid. You cannot win.

That being said, here are my NFL picks for this week.


Sunday 10/15


Buffalo (-1) at Detroit
This line makes me suspicious, but who cares? Pick the Bills to cover.
FINAL: Lions 20 Bills 17 - Fyodor loses! (I should have cared.)


Carolina (+3) at Baltimore
The Panthers have an offense. Pick Carolina and get 3 points free!
FINAL: Panthers 23 Ravens 21 - Fyodor wins!


Cincinnati (-5.5) at Tampa Bay
I don't care how many Bengals are in jail this week, I can't go with the Bucs. Take Cincy.
FINAL: Buccaneers 14 Bengals 13 - Fyodor loses! (The refs who normally screw the Seahawks screwed the Bengals this week. Or maybe their plan is to help the Steelers...)



Houston (+13) at Dallas
The Eagles' evil plan to destroy the Cowboys continues apace. Take the Texans and the points.
FINAL: Cowboys 34 Texans 6 - Fyodor loses! (What was I thinking?)


NY Giants (+3) at Atlanta
Take the Falcons at home. This might be a good game.
FINAL: Giants 27 Falcons 14 - Fyodor loses! (This also bodes well for Pittsburgh...maybe.)



Philadelphia (-3) at New Orleans
Cinderella, again. Pick the Saints.
FINAL: Saints 27 Eagles 24 - Fyodor wins!



Seattle (-3) at St. Louis
The refs screw the Seahawks yet again. Take the homestanding Rams and the points.
FINAL: Seahawks 30 Rams 28 - Fyodor wins! (I think this is the first NFC West game I have ever picked correctly.)


Tennessee (+10.5) at Washington
The Crummy Game of the Week! Will the Redskins' real offense please stand up? Pick Washington.
FINAL: Titans 25 Redskins 22 - Fyodor loses! (The whole Washington team laid down like dogs.)


Kansas City (+6.5) at Pittsburgh
Those Super Bowl memories are quickly fading, boys. I'll take the Chiefs and the points and hope for a narrow Steeler margin of victory.
FINAL: Steelers 45 (!!!) Chiefs 7 - Fyodor loses! (I would like to think we will see these Steelers for the rest of the season, but I am not going to hold my breath.)


Miami (+2) at NY Jets
What's up with this line? Every bone in my body says "Take the Jets, idiot!" And I am...but my spidey senses are tingling.
FINAL: Jets 20 Dolphins 17 - Fyodor wins! (Whew!)


San Diego (-10) at San Francisco
Pick the Chargers and hope Mr. Rivers doesn't forget how to be an NFL QB.
FINAL: Chargers 48 49ers 19 - Fyodor wins!


Oakland (+15) at Denver
The Raiders stink out loud. Go with the Broncos at home.
FINAL: Broncos 13 Raiders 3 - Fyodor loses! (Oh, yeah. I forgot. Jake Plummer.)

Monday 10/16


Chicago (-10.5) at Arizona
The Bears are for real...at least until the playoffs. Pick Chicago.
FINAL: Bears 24 Cardinals 23 - Fyodor loses! (Rex Grossman returns to form and Dennis Green's time is about up.)

Fyodor's College Football Picks of the Week.

1) The guys who set the lines are professionals. Their job is to make each game look as attractive as possible to everyone. That way they even out the amount of money bet on each side.

Instant translation: The house wins no matter who wins. That's why people get into the gambling business.

2) I am just a fan. I won't even keep track of these picks week to week if it gets too embarrassing.

3) There is no such thing as "inside information". Especially in the pros.

4) If those idiot touts on tv and in the paper were any good, they wouldn't go public with their genius. They'd sit at Harrah's sports book from open to close and then go out and buy $2,000 an hour hookers who dress like high school girls.

5) Gambling is stupid. You cannot win.

That being said, here are my college picks for this week.


Friday 10/13


Pittsburgh (-10.5) at Central Florida
Even though they're no South Florida, I'm taking Central and the points.
FINAL: Pitt 52 Central Florida 7 - Fyodor loses! (The Panthers look ready for Rutgers next week.)

Saturday 10/14


Army (+ 4.5) at Connecticut
Pick Army in a slight upset.
FINAL: UConn 21 Army 7 - Fyodor loses!


Iowa (-19.5) at Indiana
Iowa is not great, but the Hoosiers play basketball. Take Iowa to cover.
FINAL: Indiana 31 Iowa 28 - Fyodor loses! (Wow. That Ohio State loss really eviscerated the Hawkeyes.)



Wake Forest (+3) at NC State
I can't believe I'm going to pick the Demon Deacons as a road dog, but that's what I'm gonna do.
FINAL: Wake Forest 25 NC State 23 - Fyodor wins! (Nice.)


Syracuse (+25) at West Virginia
I'll go with WVU to cover the big number.
FINAL: WVU 41 Syracuse 17 - Fyodor loses! (24? Twenty-freakin'-four? That's why they call it gambling.)


Vanderbilt (+14) at Georgia
Remember when the Bulldogs would cover this kind of spread easily against the Commodores? Yep, I'm taking Vanderbilt and the points.
FINAL: Vanderbilt 24 Georgia 22 - Fyodor wins! (YES!)


Iowa State (+19.5) at Oklahoma
I'm taking another road dog and the points. Go Cyclones.
FINAL: Oklahoma 34 Iowa State 9 - Fyodor loses! (Don't worry, Mr. Peterson, the NFL awaits.)


Florida State (-22.5) at Duke
Duke played Alabama tough, and I'm betting they do the same to FSU. Pick the Blue Devils.
FINAL: FSU 51 Duke 24 - Fyodor loses! (At least Duke scored 24...)


Ball State (+11) at Central Michigan
Ball State helped me last year by winning. Now they help me by losing big. Pick CMU.
FINAL: CMU 18 Ball State 7 - PUSH! (Sometimes I don't know why I bother.)


Rutgers (+3) at Navy
I love Navy's running game, but I've got to take Rutgers and the points.
FINAL: Rutgers 34 Navy 0 - Fyodor wins!


Cincinnati (+25) at Louisville
The Bearcats stink. Pick Louisville.
FINAL: Louisville 23 Cincinnati 17 - Fyodor loses! (I stink. Don't trust my picks.)


Ohio State (-14) at Michigan State
The Buckeyes are due for a bad game, but this isn't going to be it. Pick OSU.
FINAL: OSU 38 MSU 7 - Fyodor wins!


Mississippi (+15.5) at Alabama
Which Bama team will show up? The one that doesn't cover the spread. Pick Ole Miss.
FINAL: Alabama 26 Mississippi 23 - Fyodor wins! (Oh, Margaret!)


UCLA (+9) at Oregon
Boring! Oregon will cover because...they're at home.
FINAL: Oregon 30 UCLA 20 - Fyodor wins!


California (-8.5) at Washington State
I hope the Bears saved some of that O from last week. Pick Cal to cover.
FINAL: Cal 21 Washington State 3 - Fyodor wins! (Yep.)


Baylor (+27) at Texas
Another one of those games. Take the Longhorns to cover the number against the Bears.
FINAL: Texas 63 (!!!) Baylor 31 (???) - Fyodor wins!


Nebraska (-9) at Kansas State
I hate picking Nebraska, but I must!
FINAL: Nebraska 21 Kansas State 3 - Fyodor wins!



Florida (-2) at Auburn
Will Auburn be angry enough about last week to beat the mighty Gators? Nope. Take Florida.
FINAL: Auburn 27 Florida 17 - Fyodor loses! (Instant replay, again.)


Arizona State (+18.5) at USC
Take the Sun Devils and the points. Trust me.
FINAL: USC 28 ASU 21 - Fyodor wins! (Trust is a beautiful thing.)


Kentucky (+26.5) at LSU
I hate this number. Pick the Wildcats and the points, but I wouldn't bet my money on it.
FINAL: LSU 49 Kentucky 0 - Fyodor loses! (Like I said.)

Michigan (-6) at Penn State
Take the Wolverines. Big time. I'd like to see the Lions win, and Manningham is out, and Hunt reminded Joe Paterno to run the ball, but I just can't...Remember, kiddies: Bet with your head, not your heart.
FINAL: Michigan 17 PSU 10 - Fyodor wins! (Like I said.)

Nobel invented dynamite, you know.

Long Island Business News: Economists propose wage hike
More than 650 economists, including five winners of the Nobel Prize for economics, called for an increase in the minimum wage, saying the value of the last increase, in 1997, has been "fully eroded."

Instant translation: With all that prize money, we, your moral and intellectual superiors, need not worry about the inflationary ramifications of our political beliefs.

Doy. Double doy, even.

CBS News: Men Delay ER Trips To Watch Sports

(WebMD) Some men may take their sports too seriously, delaying trips to hospital emergency rooms during major sports events.

So say researchers including David Jerrard, MD, of the University of Maryland Medical Center in Baltimore.

Their findings will be presented next week in New Orleans at the 37th annual scientific session of the American College of Emergency Physicians (ACEP).

"It's important for everyone to seek immediate medical attention when they are experiencing the symptoms of a medical emergency," Jerrard says in an ACEP news release.

"Men should not risk their health by putting off going to the emergency room because they want to see the final results of a football game," he continues. "It could be the last game they ever see."

Oooooooh! Scary!

Game Over

Jerrard's team studied the number of men admitted to the University of Maryland Medical Center in the four hours following nearly 800 televised games over three years.

The games were either postseason professional football games, major league baseball games, or Division l college football or basketball games.

For comparison, the researchers also tracked the number of men admitted to the same ER during the same hours on days without major, televised sports matches.

More men were seen in the hours after games than on nongame days, the study shows.

"In our previous study, we found that visits by men to emergency departments declined during televised sporting events, "Jerrard says in an ACEP news release.

Those are probably the fans of the losing teams. Life is a lot less dear when you back a loser. Just ask Kerry and Gore voters.

He says the new study was designed to see "whether there was an increase in visits by men once games were over, and that's exactly what we found."The pattern doesn't seem to be limited to championship games, such as the Super Bowl, Jerrard notes.

Seriously, ladies, this story should be enough to get you out of the military, the police, and the firehouses forever. It should be enough to get you to burn all your pants and buy petticoats by the gross.

Trust me, you really don't want to be like us.

When to Go to the Emergency Room

Do you know when to go to the emergency room? The American College of Emergency Physicians says these symptoms indicate a medical emergency:

Difficulty breathing, shortness of breath

Chest or upper abdominal pain or pressure

Fainting, sudden dizziness, weakness

Changes in vision

Confusion or changes in mental status

Any sudden or severe pain

So far, this sounds just how I imagine my first date with Lindsay Lohan will be.

Uncontrolled bleeding

Severe or persistent vomiting or diarrhea

Yep...

Coughing or vomiting blood

Suicidal feelings

Difficulty speaking

Shortness of breath

Unusual abdominal pain

Definitely La Lohan.

SOURCES: American College of Emergency Physicians' 37th Annual Scientific Assembly, New Orleans, Oct. 15-18, 2006. News release, American College of Emergency Physicians. American College of Emergency Physicians: "When Should I Go to the Emergency Department?"

Steelers Update.

From the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review:

Steelers sign veteran linebacker Brown
Joey Porter is out, and Chad Brown -- yes, that Chad Brown -- is in.

Chiefs' Edwards has reason to be wary of Pittsburgh

NFL capsules: Steelers need a win badly

Notebook: Porter out for Sunday

Penguins Update.

From the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review:

Pens win on late-game heroics
Sidney Crosby's last-minute goal lifted Penguins to 6-5 win over the New York Rangers.

Crosby lift Penguins over Rangers 6-5

Notebook: Moore remembers chasing Crosby

Penguins farm report

Justice is served...

...if he serves his full sentence.

Pittsburgh Tribune-Review: Fayette T-ball coach goes straight to prison
A Fayette County T-ball coach was sent directly to prison Thursday for offering one of his players $25 to intentionally hit an autistic teammate with a ball during a pre-game warm-up last year.

Website of the Day.

Do you want to cut through the campaign nonsense and see how the candidates actually voted on the issues important to you?

Project Vote Smart looks like a good place to start.

Right Wing Smile of the Day.

From moral bankruptcy to the kind of bankruptcy they do understand in a few short months...

But then again, what did you expect from people who are neither entertaining or informative?

AP: Air America Radio files for Chapter 11
Air America Radio, the liberal talk and news radio network that features the comedian Al Franken, has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection, a network official told The Associated Press.

Support hot Turkish babes: Various and sundry. (Part Three)

From the pages of The King Abdullah Gazette, here are

Enise Ütük:

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Eser Dağdelen:

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Funda Durur:

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Gülin Hatipoğlu:

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Gülin Tomay:

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Gülsün Durak:

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Totalitarian Harrisburg Update.

As Tipsy O'Neill used to say, "All totalitarianism is local". Check out the mess our moral and intellectual superiors have made of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania's capital from The Harrisburg Patriot-News.


Cities caught in cash crunch
$13.4 million deficit, a proposed tax increase and the threat of employee layoffs don't make Harrisburg unique...

Ooh! Ooh! Let me guess! It's Bush's fault!

Cities are vulnerable because they have little or no room to grow and large numbers of people with lower incomes who require social services. Plus, many contain a lot of tax-exempt property, she said.

In Lancaster, for example, 25 percent of city properties are exempt from real estate tax, said Mayor Rick Gray. In Harrisburg, state buildings help push that number to more than 48 percent.

Wow! It's the fault of runaway government growth at all levels. Who knew?

Added to these problems is a continued decrease in state and federal aid, Miller said.

Heehee!


Council refuses $14 million bailout
Harrisburg's cash crunch just got tighter.

The City Council voted 5-2 last night to table a $14 million budget bail-out loan that city officials say is needed for the city to meet payroll and avoid layoffs for the rest of this year.

As anyone with a credit card can tell you, a loan is not really a bailout if you must repay it.

In delaying action on the loan, council members complained of incomplete information, hinted that the deficit may be inflated and pointed out the lack of a long-range financial plan to fix the problem.

"It seems irresponsible to borrow $14 million with no plan in place," said Councilman Dan Miller, a certified public accountant.

Wowee wow wow! How did that guy get elected?


Police, fire crews lead city's layoff list
Police and firefighters will be among the first to go if Harrisburg is forced to lay off workers to resolve its financial crisis.

The city's 268 nonuniformed, nonmanagement workers are protected through the end of this year by a no-layoff clause in their union contracts.

Instant translation: The bureaucrats fat asses are covered.

That means the city's 173 police and 90 firefighters are likely to bear the brunt of the burden.

Ain't it funny how those city employees the citizens value and need most are always the first to be laid-off? I detect a whiff of berechtigung-verrücktheit.

Layoffs would come at a time when the city has been working to put more officers on the streets to combat what Mayor Stephen R. Reed has called a "culture of violence."

No! Say it ain't so, Stevie!

BTW, for how many consecutive terms have you controlled the city?

At the same time, the city's firefighters are operating with staffing levels below those recommended by the National Fire Protection Association.

Meanwhile, Harrisburg's Bürgermeister-For-Life, (Ha! Just kidding. He's a proud Democrass babykiller! I love that ol' double entendre.) Steve "Bareback" Reed, struggles to keep his dream of a Wild West museum for Harrisburg alive...

Selling off Wild West artifacts would provide a good faith test in straightening city's finances

While it may not be directly relevant to the current mess, Councilwoman Linda Thompson nevertheless was on point in calling on the mayor to liquidate his collection, valued at nearly $11 million, of artifacts ostensibly gathered to form the collection for the National Museum of the Wild West he aspires to build.

Reed has used funds from the Harrisburg Authority to amass this collection, spending $100,000 in each of the last two years, despite little interest or financial support for this undertaking. Earlier, he had agreed to sell off part of the collection.

If the collection were sold, the proceeds could be used to limit or eliminate future increases in water rates, which are up more than 26 percent this year alone, or they could be transferred to the General Fund to pay off the bail-out loan.

Let the peasants drink out of the horse troughs in Stevie's latest museum...

Behold the humor of a Heat Nazi.

Some retromingent Genius of Pseudo-Science who goes by the nom de fraude of David Roberts (see artist's sketch at left) gets a tiny woody because somebody noticed him when he jokingly advocated the execution of people who disagree with him. We now join Dave's favorite masturbatory fantasy at the point where he is...

...publicly attacked by the U.S. Senate Committee on Environment & Public Works. They hate me!

They really hate me!

Some background: EPW is chaired by everyone's favorite flat-earther, Sen. James Inhofe (R-Mongo). A while back, Inhofe hired Marc Morano of CNS news -- famous (if that's the word) for writing this piece questioning whether war veteran Rep. Jack Murtha (D-PA) faked the wounds that got him two purple hearts -- to head up his communications operation. Morano wasted no time firing off press release blasts attacking various reporters and public figures for "bias." (Remember, in the right-wing dictionary, "bias" means a stubborn insistence on distinguishing truth from falsehood.)

Today, I have the dubious honor of being the target of one of these attacks.

Now, Morano's a standard-issue movement hack and Inhofe is increasingly regarded as a clown, even by his Senate colleagues, so the value of responding to this kind of thing is questionable. But Morano has accidentally raised an interesting point, so here goes.

What caught Morano's attention is a blog post in which I, in the grandiose rhetorical style for which I am so marginally beloved, said:


When we've finally gotten serious about global warming, when the impacts are really hitting us and we're in a full worldwide scramble to minimize the damage, we should have war crimes trials for these bastards -- some sort of climate Nuremberg.
Memo To The Moron: Don't let it go to your head, Dave. We always notice those who advocate the killing of their political opponents. Even jokingly, as you claim. Why? Well...Mao, for instance. He really loved his whoopie cushions.

Golly, kiddies, what group would subvert our precious voting system?

Could it be the Klan? The John Birch Society? The Trilateral Commission? The Council on Foreign Relations? The editors of The Weekly Standard? Goat rapists? Space aliens? Scientologists?

Nope.

It is ACORN, a nationwide left-fascist organization whose mission is to keep poor folks right where they are so the morally and intellectually superior gangsters who run the thing can sell their votes to The Party Of Blasphemy, Buggery, and 'Bortion.

Columbia Daily Tribune: Group accused of voter fraud

ST. LOUIS (AP) - St. Louis election officials say hundreds of potentially bogus voter registration cards were submitted by a group that’s been criticized by other election leaders for registering invalid and potentially fraudulent voters.

The Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now - or ACORN - yesterday stood by the integrity of its not-for-profit mission, to send paid and volunteer workers around cities to sign up new voters.

At least 1,500 potentially fraudulent voter registration cards were turned in by the St. Louis ACORN branch leading up to yesterday’s voter registration deadline for the Nov. 7 election, St. Louis City Board of Election Commissioners Chairwoman Kim Mathis said.

Invalid voter registrations solicited by ACORN workers included duplicate or incomplete registrations, a 16-year-old voter, dead people registering and forged signatures, Mathis said.

"Fifteen hundred may not sound like a lot, but it is a big deal and it disenfranchises the election process," Mathis said. "It’s time someone be prosecuted. There’s a lot of taxpayer dollars being wasted on this."

ACORN spokesman Brian Mellor told the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, which first reported the potential fraud, that prosecution could be warranted.

"We try very hard to monitor the employees, but there are chances of things slipping through," Mellor said. He did not return phone calls from The Associated Press.

ACORN ran voter registration drives in Missouri and 16 other states this year. Similar allegations have been made in Pennsylvania, Ohio and Denver, though no charges have been filed.

St. Louis Republican elections director Scott Leiendecker said that once a final count of potentially fraudulent submissions is finished next week, he will turn the matter over to authorities for possible prosecution.

In a statement responding to the Ohio allegations last week, ACORN’s national president, Maude Hurd, said her organizations do not commit voter fraud.

"We work hard to bring new people into the democratic process and work to maintain good quality control," Hurd said.

Control is the key word in her vocabulary.

DAY 51: PLUTO HELD HOSTAGE

My fellow Pennsylvanians, please do not vote for this low-grade moron Casey.

If Bobbie "I AM MY FATHER!" Casey is elected to the position of Harry Reid's bitch, the Keystone State will be the laughingstock of the Union.

The following exchange was Miss Casey's best of the night.

Phillyburbs.com: Excerpt from Santorum-Casey debate in Pittsburgh

Sen. Rick Santorum:
I'm a senator from Pennsylvania. My residence is in Pennsylvania. That's where I pay my taxes, that's where my driver's license is. We have a three-bedroom home. My kids and I slept there last night, as we do on most occasions when we're here in the commonwealth...
That's the reality of the situation. Most of my time is in Washington because that's what you sent me to do. You sent me to go to Washington to fight hard, to show up for work which is something that my opponent doesn't do.

Bob Casey:
... You spend a lot of your time attacking me over and over and over again. If we're going to have a debate about who's working harder, I think you should talk to your colleague, Sen. (Arlen) Specter. He says, said it in Washington a couple of weeks ago, that you guys don't meet very often. In fact he wants to extend the work week because you don't work very hard in the U.S. Senate right now. And I agree with him. I think you guys should have a longer work week...

Santorum:
All I'm going to say is that we spent 35 to 40 weeks out of the year and I show up to work.

Casey:
So do I. So do I.

Santorum:
Last month, how many days were you in the office 9 to 5 in the treasurer's office?

Casey:
Why don't you answer the question, Sen.?

Santorum:
How many days were you in the treasurer's office 9 to 5 last month?

Casey:
As much as you were in the U.S. Senate.

Santorum:
Not many. I spent, I've got 88 percent of the votes and ... the votes I missed because I was here for a funeral for Bob O'Connor. Answer the question. Look in the camera and tell the people how many 9 to 5 days you spent.

Casey:
Sen., answer your question and I'll answer.

Santorum:
I just did. I told you, I told exactly the ... Look in the camera, Mr. Casey. Look in the camera and tell the people how much time you spend in the office. ... This is a legitimate question. He's questioning my work ethic. I had ... a 95 percent voting record this year and the toughest Senate race in the country and this gentlemen doesn't show up for work. They chronicled last year, last year he only spent 50 percent of the time at work. Now I want you to look in the camera and tell people how many full days of work you spent at the treasurer's office last month.

Sure, but she's only 17...

USA Today: Whiff, rulings highlight Wie's strange round at Samsung World Championship
Something about Michelle Wie seems to attract rulings. A year after being disqualified from the Samsung World Championship because of a violation of the Rules of Golf, Wie spent a good part of Thursday's first round of this year's Samsung getting rulings on wayward shots and struggling to a roller-coaster round of 2-over 74.

Is this another crooked land deal by Senator Social Moderate, or is this the same one?

World Net Daily: Corruption claimed in Harry Reid deal

Senate Democratic Leader Harry Reid hung up the phone when questioned by the Associated Press about a $1.1 million windfall on land he had not owned for three years, the wire service is reporting.

Reid collected on the Las Vegas land sale in a deal engineered by a longtime friend and former casino lawyer, Jay Brown, whose name has surfaced in organized crime investigations, the AP said.

According to records and interviews obtained by the AP, the senator did not disclose to Congress an earlier sale in which he transferred his land to a company created by a friend and took a financial stake in the company.
Defending the senator, his aides argued the deal was not disclosed because it was considered a "technical transfer."

They got Capone on a technicality.

Investor Business Daily: Harry Reid: Swamp Thing
Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi wants to "drain the swamp" after more than a decade of GOP rule. She should hunt the crocs in her own party, starting with Harry Reid.

Somebody has the stomach to wade into Senator Social Moderate's financial cesspool:

The Strata-Sphere.com: The Reid Kickbacks

Religion of Perpetual Outrage Update.

Fox 23: Report: Kidnappers of beheaded priest demanded apology for pope's speech

Relatives of a beheaded Iraqi priest say his captors had demanded a church apology for recent papal comments about Islam.

They say the Orthodox priest was abducted Sunday by an unidentified group, which demanded a ransom. The kidnappers also wanted the priest's church to condemn controversial recent remarks by Pope Benedict. In a speech last month, the pope quoted a medieval text describing Islam as a religion spread by the sword.

Note the ignorance...

The relatives said the priest's church had already posted signs condemning the pope's statement. A similar message was posted again after the abduction. The priest's son had apparently been talking with the kidnappers by phone, and had agreed to pay a 40-thousand dollar ransom.

...and common criminality of the goat rapists.

But contact abruptly ceased Tuesday night. The priest's decapitated body was found yesterday in the northern Iraq city of Mosul.

May God have mercy on his soul.

HOLY CRAP!!! HOW LONG WAS I GONE???

Do not fret, kiddies. Mr. Medved (America's greatest movie critic) stayed up late to make an important point.

Bloody Christian Riots Protest Blasphemous Album?
Posted by: Michael Medved at 1:58 AM

You’ve probably already heard some of the horrifying news…

In more than a dozen nations around the world, angry Christian mobs have attacked U.S. businesses and British embassies, venting their rage at a what is perceived as a grievous affront to their faith. Beginning in Nigeria, some of the Anglican faithful left church services last Sunday after being whipped into a frenzy by fiery sermons, and proceeded to burn cars, smash shop windows, attack police officers, and to burn Bush and Blair in effigy. Catholics in Bolivia bombed a police station and vandalized railroad cars, while Pentecostals in Ukraine called a two day general strike and staged mass protest rallies to demand that their stunned government take prompt action.

The basis for the worldwide Christian fury, still seething in many corners of the globe and ready for further explosions of violence, was the release of a “death metal” album on a nominally British label (EMI) by the controversial American group Slayer. The name of the album, “Christ Illusion,” seemed calculated to provoke devout believers, especially because the shocking cover art featured an image of Jesus with both arms amputated and an eye gouged out of its socket, posing in front of other bloody severed heads and limbs. A featured song on the album, “Skeleton Christ,” further provoked outrage from religious communities that seemed unable to control the spontaneous indignation of the furious masses.

If you haven’t heard chilling reports of these world-wide riots, don’t blame the news media: you haven’t learned of them because they never happened. There have been no Christian riots in Nigeria, Bolivia, Ukraine or anywhere else. I made the whole thing up --- in order, I hope, to make an important point.

Christians everywhere have been too busy caring for their families, working hard at their jobs, helping the less fortunate, worshipping God and studying his word to surrender to the temptations of outrage and revenge. (Emphasis mine.) The album from Slayer, “Christ Illusion,” is all too real, and it is indeed calculated to wound, insult and offend Christian believers. But one of the reasons I love, honor and respect my faithful Christian neighbors and fellow citizens is that they have reliably refused to take the bait. In India, leaders of the tiny Catholic community lodged some peaceful protests and the corporate officials at EMI India agreed to remove the offensive albums from sale. This moderate response appears to represent the most intense objection anywhere to the album’s international release.

The contrast with the Muslim reaction to any perceived insult to Mohammed or Islam is hugely instructive. The now infamous Danish cartoons really did provoke worldwide rioting (and cost at least 200 lives and hundreds of millions of dollars in damage) while representing a far less formidable affront than the new Slayer album. The veteran rockers are far better known, with a vastly wider international audience, than the obscure Copenhagen cartoonists, and the corporation promoting “Christ Illusion” is one of the world’s leading music conglomerates, not a single newspaper little known outside of Denmark. Try to imagine that the death metal geniuses had called their new release, “Mohammed Illusion” instead of “Christ Illusion,” and had featured cover art with an image of the Prophet with his arms cut down to bloody stumps and a missing eye and mutilated face. Isn’t it safe to assume that such a pop music release would have provoked universal denunciation, death threats, fatwas, fire-breathing sermons everywhere, bombs, hysteria, surging lynch mobs, self righteous ululation, UN resolutions, vandalism, hijackings, recalled ambassadors and new confirmations of the epidemic of paranoia among hundreds of millions of crazed adherents of ROPO (the Religion Of Perpetual Outrage).

HEEHEE!

The fact that Christians didn’t respond in this way to the Slayer silliness isn’t an indication of the weakness of their faith, but a demonstration of its strength. The constant agitation of Muslim leaders, always ready to explode over some new expression of alleged disrespect, doesn’t show the power and sincerity of Islam, but its pathetic insecurity and its prevailing sense of vulnerability.

Yep. The truth shall set ye free, my mohammedan brothers and sisters.

Is it any accident that atheists and secularists today display a touchiness and a quickness to take offense that more closely resembles the attitudes of fanatical Muslims than the long-suffering, tough-to-shake confidence of believing Christians? The insistence on erasing or at least opposing public religious symbols of every kind – including those that were installed many decades ago – echoes the eagerness of the Taliban to obliterate the 1,600 year old Buddhas of the Bamayan Valley of Afghanistan. For both secular militants and Muslim extremists, the intolerance of any dissenters and infidels stems from a deep-seated sense that the tide of history is running against them: that the battle of ideas and the ongoing struggle for the souls of a new generation don’t favor the frenzied followers of either Mohammed or Bertrand Russell. Judeo-Christian believers, on the other hand, comfortably can accept expressions of religious attitudes very different from our own because of an unshakable inner certainty that our faiths are flourishing.

Exactly, Brother Medved, exactly!

That doesn’t make the ugly Slayer album any more acceptable --- or their wretchedly adolescent, cacophonous music any more endurable. But the mild, philosophical, largely indifferent reaction from fervent believers (who have learned to expect and accept heavy doses of Christian bashing) serves to remind the world what constitutes the true “Religion(s) of Peace.”

wow. Ol' Blogger happens to be working...

I know, I know. What do you want for free?

BTW, a belated Happy Real Columbus Day, kiddies. You remember Christopher Columbus, don't you? He discovered America. That means he did something with it when he found it. He didn't just run away like those sissy vikings.

Saint of the Day and daily Mass readings.

Today is the Feast of St. Edward the Confessor, King of England. Pray for us, all you angels and saints.


Today's reading is
Galatians 3:7-14.
Today's Responsorial Psalm is
Psalms 111:1-2, 3-4, 5-6.
Today's Gospel reading is
Luke 11:15-26.


Everyday links:

The Blessed Virgin Mary
The Rosary
Our Mother of Perpetual Help
Prayers from EWTN
National Coalition of Clergy and Laity (dedicated to action for a genuine Catholic Restoration)
The Catholic Calendar Page for Today
ZENIT - The World Seen From Rome


Just in case you are wondering what exactly Catholics believe, here is

The Apostles Creed

I believe in God, the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and earth; and in Jesus Christ, His only Son Our Lord, Who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and was buried.He descended into Hell; the third day He rose again from the dead; He ascended into Heaven, and sitteth at the right hand of God, the Father almighty; from thence He shall come to judge the living and the dead.I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body and life everlasting. Amen.


Memorare

Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that any one who fled to thy protection, implored thy help or sought thy intercession,was left unaided.Inspired with this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of virgins my Mother; to thee do I come, before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful; O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy clemency hear and answer me. Amen.


St. Joseph, her most chaste spouse, pray for us.


Anima Christi

Soul of Christ, sanctify me; Body of Christ, save me; Blood of Christ, inebriate me; Water from Christ's side, wash me; Passion of Christ, strengthen me; O good Jesus, hear me; Within Thy wounds hide me; Suffer me not to be separated from Thee; From the malicious enemy defend me; In the hour of my death call me; And bid me come unto Thee; That I may praise Thee with Thy saints and with Thy angels Forever and ever. Amen.


Prayer to St. Anthony, Martyr of Desire

Dear St. Anthony, you became a Franciscan with the hope of shedding your blood for Christ. In God's plan for you, your thirst for martyrdom was never to be satisfied. St. Anthony, Martyr of Desire, pray that I may become less afraid to stand up and be counted as a follower of the Lord Jesus. Intercede also for my other intentions. (Name them.)


Prayer To Saint Michael The Archangel

St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil; may God rebuke him, we humbly pray, and do thou O Prince of the heavenly hosts, by the divine power, thrust into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.


Prayer to End Abortion

Lord God, I thank You today for the gift of my life, and for the lives of all my brothers and sisters. I know there is nothing that destroys more life than abortion, yet I rejoice that you have conquered death by the resurrection of Your Son. I am ready to do my part to end abortion. Today I commit myself never to be silent, never to be passive, and never to be forgetful of the unborn. I commit myself to be active in the pro-life movement, and never stop defending life until all my brothers and sisters are protected and our nation once again becomes a nation with liberty and justice, not just for some, but for all. Through Christ our Lord. Amen.


Prayer For Vocations

Send forth your Spirit, Lord, into the hearts of your faithful people, that we may be conscious of our vocation to holiness and sevice to others. Grant that many of us may dedicate ourselves to You through the priesthood and the religious life.We pray especially for the needs of our own parish and diocese. Grant that we may always have sufficient good and holy priests, and dedicated Sisters to serve our commumities.We pray, too, for religious orders; that generous men may join them to become zealous missionaries in preaching the Gospel in word and action, especially to the poor and abandoned.We make this prayer through Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Redeemer. Amen.


Prayer Before The Crucifix

Behold, O kind and gentle Jesus, I kneel before Thee and pray that Thou would impress upon my heart the virtues of faith, hope, and charity, with true repentance for my sins and a firm purpose of amendment. At the same time, with sorrow I meditate on Thy five precious wounds, having in mind the words which David spoke in prophecy: "They have pierced my hands and my feet. I can count all my bones."


Divine Praises

Blessed be God.
Blessed be His Holy Name.
Blessed be Jesus Christ, true God and true Man.
Blessed be the Name of Jesus.
Blessed be His most Sacred Heart.
Blessed be His most Precious Blood.
Blessed be Jesus in the most Holy Sacrament of the Altar.
Blessed be the Holy Spirit, the Paraclete.
Blessed be the great Mother of God, Mary most holy.
Blessed be her holy and Immaculate Conception.
Blessed be her glorious Assumption.
Blessed be the name of Mary, Virgin and Mother.
Blessed be Saint Joseph, her most chaste spouse.
Blessed be God in His angels and in His saints.
May the Heart of Jesus in the most Blessed Sacrament
Be praised, adored and loved
With grateful affection at every moment
In all the tabernacles of the world
Even to the end of time. Amen.

About Me

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First of all, the word is SEX, not GENDER. If you are ever tempted to use the word GENDER, don't. The word is SEX! SEX! SEX! SEX! For example: "My sex is male." is correct. "My gender is male." means nothing. Look it up. What kind of sick neo-Puritan nonsense is this? Idiot left-fascists, get your blood-soaked paws off the English language. Hence I am choosing "male" under protest.

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