From The Brutalization Of Our Girls Department:

Catholic Schools Crack Up Division.

The quarterback on Bishop Montgomery High's team throws like a girl because, well, she is one.

Spectators would be hard-pressed to pick sophomore Miranda McOsker out of the blur of players on the field. Her brunette ponytail blends into her black jersey, and she can throw the ball accurately for 40 yards or more.

The 15-year-old McOsker is the starting quarterback for the junior varsity team and the third stringer on the varsity. She also plays JV girls basketball.

The 5-foot-9, 140-pound McOsker got into a varsity game recently after the Knights built a 28-0 halftime lead against Ribet Academy and the No. 2 quarterback was injured. She threw for three touchdowns – the longest was 65 yards – and went 3-for-5 for 175 yards playing the entire second half of the 55-14 win.

"Football is one of the best sports for the family atmosphere," McOsker said. "These boys are your brothers. You will be with them forever. I love it. They are the nicest group of people."

She went out for the private Catholic school's team last spring, after not even attending a game as a freshman.

"I thought I could do it, so I tried it," she said. "To play for your school is one of the best things you can do."

Playing with boys isn't new. In middle school, she was one of two girls on the flag football team.

"I admire her a lot because she's doing what she wants to do," said T.K. Carter, the mother of receiver Kevin Carter III. "He said he really admires her because she knows the plays."

Wednesdays are Spirit Days at Bishop Montgomery, where athletes wear their jerseys instead of the regulation school uniform. McOsker makes her own fashion statement by adding a skirt.

"She's just tough. No one messes with her at all," said sophomore Sarah Prather, a friend. "Everyone has her back. It's pretty cool. I'm jealous."

Girls playing prep football are still a novelty, with 253 girls among 100,000 high school students who play in California.

"The real heroes of this are my coaches and my teammates for accepting me," McOsker said. "They never had a doubt in their mind that I could do it."

But McOsker is leery about the burst of attention she's received since her breakout performance. Her father has fielded calls from the Oprah Winfrey, David Letterman and Ellen DeGeneres shows – she turned them all down.

Yeah, I'll bet Ellen Degenerate wants to talk to her.

"I don't think I really deserve it. It's just because I'm a girl," she said.

"When I first started getting all this attention, the first person I went to talk about this was my parish priest. I pray to God, 'Please, your will be done. If this is your plan, then I'm there for you.'"

McOsker's mother, Connie, describes her daughter as deeply religious and said that, when Miranda was little, she wanted to grow up to be pope.

Actually, that is possible. There is no rule saying the pope must be a priest.

Among her current career ambitions are firefighting (it runs in her family), coaching or religion.

More than anything, McOsker doesn't want the attention to detract from her teammates.

"I'm very grateful, but sometimes it's a bit much because I'm a JV quarterback, we're a JV team," she said. "We got a great group of guys over here, but we don't win all the time so it's not something that most people would be interested in. I hope that all this publicity is good for the school and good for the football team."

JV coach Uiva Tuliau said whether McOsker plays varsity depends on her potential to understand the game better, read defenses and make solid throws.

With each game, McOsker has grown more comfortable at QB. If the receivers line up in the wrong position, she'll move them.

"She's our man for the year," Tuliau said. "Maybe she starts a trend."

HaHaHa. That is so funny.

Before home games, McOsker changes in the girls' locker room. Once her teammates have their pants on, she joins them in the boys' locker room to go over strategy. The only difference in equipment is the chest protector she wears. Her dad had to show her how to put on the pads.

"I just worry about her getting hurt," Tim McOsker said. "Maybe it's a little unfair. Maybe she's proving her point, I shouldn't be more nervous for a girl playing ball."

At a recent JV game, McOsker was cheered by several members of her tight-knit family, including her grandfather, two grandmothers and an uncle.

They whooped it up when receivers caught her passes, and urged her on after she threw a couple of interceptions and got sacked. It wasn't a good day for the Knights, who lost 41-14 to Crespi High of Encino.

After darkness enveloped the field a few miles from the Pacific Ocean, a sore McOsker rested on a metal bench as teammates and opponents alike walked by.

"Good game, 'Randa," one said, hitting her in the arm. She punched him back.

"Hey, superstar," said another as she smiled sheepishly.

Word got around on Crespi's side of the field that the Bishop Montgomery quarterback was a girl.

"You can't tell at all," said Bridgitte Williams, whose son is an offensive lineman for Crespi, an all-boys Catholic school. "My son sacked her three times and I don't think he cares. She's handling herself really good."

"She's out there because she can play," said Joseph Heitkemper, whose son is a Crespi receiver.

She's out there because they don't have any boys who can do the job. At least I hope that's the reason.

The Knights had a 2-3 record going into this week's game. And, even more important, it was Homecoming weekend and McOsker had a date for the big dance with a varsity linebacker.

"I'm excited," she said. "I'm going to hang out with a lot of the football players."