Ack! That's chicken you-know-what on a croissant! Get that French stuff outta here!
That's better, even though it has turkey on it instead of capicola and Genoa salami. And that olive is a rather effete touch, don't you think?
Face the facts. You wouldn't know a panini if it took your daughter to the prom.
Take pride in your extremely limited culinary heritage and call it what it is, a freakin' tuna melt. And lower the price to a more reasonable $3.00.
(Humblest appy-polly loggies, kiddies. Old Fyodor had a bad lunch hour today.)
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