Why The Best of the Web Today really is.

First there is an update for yesterday's post on The Great Cartoon War of '06...

Lucky Duckies
In an item yesterday on "Tom and Jerry," we mentioned "The Ducktators," a 1942 Looney Tunes short depicting an anatine Hitler and an anserine Mussolini. It turns out a video (albeit of rather poor quality) is available through Google; click here.

And yes, we are aware that Disney had nothing to do with "Tom and Jerry."


...then the Material Girl shows up...

We Suppose Anything Would Have Been an Improvement
"Madonna Better After Horse Accident"--headline, Associated Press, Feb. 27

...I love the Bottom Stories...

Bottom Story of the Day
"Witnesses Reported Seeing Nothing Unusual . . ."--headline, Reuters, Feb. 27

...and then there is this gem that rounds out BotWT for 2/28/06...

Service With a Smile
Daniel Andrew Wolcott, 22, is awaiting trial in Gwinnett County, Ga., on charges of stealing a $7 million private plane, and the Atlanta Journal-Constitution reports he's unhappy with the jail conditions:

Wolcott's parents, Scott and Diane Wolcott, have been at odds with [Sheriff Butch] Conway since November over dental floss not being allowed in the jail.

They say their son's inability to floss caused him to develop
gingivitis and gum pockets, which if left untreated could become full-blown periodontal disease.

Conway came up with a solution, reports the AJC:

"I had him moved to a cell with Bart Corbin." Corbin is a dentist who is charged with murdering his wife. "[Corbin's] trained in dentistry, and if there are any complications, they can advise the medical unit," Conway tells the paper. "[Wolcott] just had his wisdom teeth out, so I think it's a good thing he's in a cell with a dentist."

Wolcott's parents aren't amused:

"I'm taking on a very serious health care issue, and I don't appreciate Sheriff Conway making a joke out of it," Scott Wolcott said. "I don't think the Georgia or American dental associations would find it very funny, either."

Maybe not, but it certainly brings a bright, shiny smile to our face.