Fyodor's Pro Football Picks of the Week.

1) The guys who set the lines are professionals. Their job is to make each game look as attractive as possible to everyone. That way they even out the amount of money bet on each side.
Instant translation: The house wins no matter who wins. That's why people get into the gambling business.

2) I am just a fan. I won't even keep track of these picks week to week if it gets too embarrassing.

3) There is no such thing as "inside information". Especially in the pros.

4) If those idiot touts on tv and in the paper were any good, they wouldn't go public with their genius. They'd sit at Harrah's sports book from open to close and then go out and buy $2,000 an hour hookers who dress like high school girls.

5) Gambling is stupid. You cannot win.

That being said, here are my NFL picks for this week.


Saturday 12/24


Atlanta (+3) at Tampa Bay
The Bucs know how to stop Vick. Take Tampa.
FINAL: Bucs 27 Falcons 24 - PUSH!



Buffalo (+13.5) at Cincinnati
The number is too big. Take the Bills and the points.
FINAL: Bills 37 Bengals 27 - Fyodor wins! (Bengals stumble toward the playoffs.)



Dallas (+5) at Carolina
Both are struggling, but Panthers less so. Pick Carolina to cover.
FINAL: Cowboys 27 Panthers 20 - Fyodor loses! (Talk about late season swoons...)


Detroit (+3) at (sort of) New Orleans
Ta-da! The Crummy Game of the Year! Take the Lions for no apparent reason.
FINAL: Lions 13 Saints 12 - Fyodor wins! (Even crummier than anticipated.)


Jacksonville (-6.5) at Houston
Jaguars will cover easily.
FINAL: Jaguars 38 Texans 20 - Fyodor wins! (Yep.)



NY Giants (+3) at Washington
This should be a good one. I think the Redskins are hungrier. Take Washington.
FINAL: Redskins 35 NY Giants 20 - Fyodor wins! (Giants won't win a playoff game.)


Pittsburgh (-7.5) at Cleveland
A tough number for the Steelers to cover in a road rivalry game. But I'm going with 'em anyway. Pick Pittsburgh.
FINAL: Steelers 41 Browns 0 - Fyodor wins! (The Steelers' D is hot. Ben's thumb and the O line are the keys to playoff success.)


San Diego (-2) at Kansas City
Everything tells me to go with the Chargers, so I'm picking the Chiefs to cover.
FINAL: Chiefs 20 Chargers 10 - Fyodor wins! (What exactly does "deserve to be in the playoffs" mean? That is why the NFL has a 16 game regular season. And if the whiny Chargers don't like traveling from west coast to the east, move to Kansas, you big babies.)

San Francisco (+9) at St. Louis
I'll pick the Rams because they are home.
FINAL: 49ers 24 Rams 20 - Fyodor loses! (What was I thinking?)



Tennessee (+5.5) at Miami
I have no idea. But I'll take the Titans as a road dog to cover.
FINAL: Dolphins 24 Titans 10 - Fyodor loses! (The mammals have won 5 in a row! They "deserve" to be in the playoffs!)



Philadelphia (+1) at Arizona
This might be a good game to actually bet. (Just kidding.) Take the Eagles to cover.
FINAL: Cardinals 27 Eagles 21 - Fyodor loses! (I forgot the stinkin' Eagles quit a couple of weeks ago.)


Indianapolis (NO LINE) at Seattle
Take the Seahawks.
FINAL: Seahawks 28 Colts 13 - Fyodor wins!



Oakland (+13.5) at Denver
That's a big number. On the other hand, the Raiders stink. Pick Denver.
FINAL: Broncos 22 Raiders 3 - Fyodor wins! ("Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Al Davis, football genius.")


Sunday 12/25


Chicago (-7) at Green Bay
For the first time in a long time, take the Bears to cover at Lambeau.
FINAL: Bears 24 Packers 17 - PUSH!



Minnesota (+3) at Baltimore
Boller had the game of his career last week and the Ravens found out their coach will probably be back for another year. Take the Vikings.
FINAL: Ravens 30 Vikings 23 - Fyodor loses! (A gift for the rest of the league: it looks like Boller and Billick will be back next year.)


Monday 12/26



New England (-6) at NY Jets
Patriots are playoff ready. They'll cover big time.
FINAL: Patriots 31 Jets 21 - Fyodor wins! (The end of ABC's Monday Night Football? Who freakin' cares? At least there's a chance ESPN will treat it like a football game.)