Apparently, Al Gore has invented a time machine for Howie Spleen...

Eek! Bellbottoms and burning bras! No baths!

Crosswalk.com: Dean: 'We're About to Enter the '60s Again'

On the other hand, we could bring back muscle cars and burn more gasoline.

America is about to revisit one of the most turbulent decades in its history, Democratic National Committee Chairman Howard Dean told a religious conference in Washington, D.C., on Tuesday. "We're about to enter the '60s again," Dean said, but he was not referring to the Vietnam War or racial tensions.

HA! That's exactly what he's talking about. He wants us to run away from Iraq like we ran away from Vietnam and if he can't convince blacks that whites hate them, The Party of Blasphemy, Buggery, and 'Bortion does not have an electoral prayer.


Dean said he is looking for "the age of enlightenment led by religious figures who want to greet Americans with a moral, uplifting vision.""The problem is when we hit that '60s spot again, which I am optimistic we're about to hit, we have to make sure that we don't make the same mistakes," Dean added.

Knowing Howie's towering intellect as I do, I'm pretty sure he's talking about Timothy Leary and William Sloane Coffin.

Due to time constraints, we now move to further action.

Later in his speech Tuesday, Dean appeared to backtrack. "I'm not asking to go back to the '60s; we made some mistakes in the '60s," he said. (This ought to be good. - F.G.) "If you look at how we did public housing, we essentially created ghettoes for poor people" instead of using today's method of mixed-income housing.

Another mistake Democrats made in the '60s, Dean acknowledged, was that "we did give things away for free, and that's a huge mistake because that does create a culture of dependence, and that's not good for anybody, either," he noted, a reference to the Great Society welfare programs created by Democratic President Lyndon Johnson in the mid-1960s.

Heehee! The scary thing is he and his party are still all about buying votes with taxpayers' money.

"Those mistakes were not the downfall of our program," Dean added. (That's a lie. - F.G.) "They helped a lot more people than they hurt. (That's a huge lie. -F.G.) But we can do better and we will do better and our time is coming."

And that last one is the biggest lie of all.

Alternating between references to the "McCarthy era" of the 1950s, which he accused the Bush administration of reviving, the decade of the 1960s and the current era, Dean explained that he was "looking to go back to the same moral principles of the '50s and '60s."

Senator Joseph McCarthy (R-WI) was a better man and a better American than Howie Spleen could ever hope to be. That is indisputable unless you are more interested in your left-fascist agenda than the truth.

That was a time that stressed "everybody's in it together," he said. "We know that no one person can succeed unless everybody else succeeds."

Dean's comments Tuesday came at a religious gathering convened in the nation's capital to discuss ways of eliminating poverty. After stating that America "is about as divided as it has been probably since the Civil War," Dean declared that "we need to come together around moral principles, and I'm talking about moral principles like making sure no child goes to bed hungry at night."

It is impossible for government to be charitable. Read some history, kiddies.

"I'm talking about moral principles like making sure everybody in America has health insurance just like 36 other countries in the world," he added. "This is a moral nation, and we want it to be a moral nation again."

Making sure everybody has substandard health care is what Jesus wants for us? Shame on you, Howie. BTW, why don't you talk about your love of babykilling, Howie, and how that is sooooooooo moral.

As one method of accomplishing that goal, the DNC chairman called on Congress "to raise the minimum wage until we have a living wage in this country." He dismissed criticism of a minimum wage hike as "economists' mumbo-jumbo."

Behold the pallid Democrass version of Christianity: Denying the plain evidence our God-given senses present to us and calling it "mumbo-jumbo"! Next from Howie: THE EARTH IS FLAT!

"We're simply asking to give the people who are working for minimum wage the same raise that Congress has had every year for the last 20 years," he said.

How about we cut back both to 1968 levels, Howie? You remember '68 Howie. That was the year you discovered spouting Leninist-Leninist flapdoodle could get you laid.

Dean also stated that the Democratic Party helped give people "the opportunity to become middle class" during the 1960s.

Wow. He really may be on acid.

"I do think that empowering people to help themselves is what we should be doing in the 21st century," he added, stating that the Democratic Party now emphasizes the value of work.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahhaha-hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahhahahahahahahahahaha-hahahahahahahahahahahaahhahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha-haahhahahahahaaha!

"If you work hard, you ought to be able to support your family," the DNC chairman noted, and "in America, you need the opportunity to work hard, and that means some level of support from government -- no handouts, but some level of support so that you really do have a genuine opportunity to contribute to the country."

Now hold on there, Mister. Hitlery is doing the fake moderate thingee. Get your own schtick.

The DNC chairman pointed to President Bush's tax cuts as a major obstacle to what he called "tax fairness." He also criticized the Republican Congress for being "the biggest 'big government' government we've ever had," though he did make at least one positive comment about the GOP.

"How about if I'm a wild-eyed radical liberal who is willing to say the conservatives had some good ideas?" Dean told his audience. "But let's go back and make what we wanted to work, using some of their ideas to make sure that the mistakes don't get made again," he added.

"It's nice to see that Howard Dean's hostility to the religious community ends when people of faith vote Democrat," Republican National Committee spokesman Josh Holmes told Cybercast News Service.

Holmes added he was not surprised that "Howard Dean's political perspective is derived from a 1960s counterculture view of the world. What is surprising -- and disturbing -- is that he can urge a massive expansion of government and denounce the Democrat mistake of creating a 'culture of dependence' in the same speech."

Heehee!

"He may want to revisit that mistake to update his talking points and the Democrat policy manual," Holmes said.

Before leaving Tuesday's conference, the DNC chairman thanked those in attendance for giving him "a big lift."

"I came in the wrong door when I first got here," Dean said. "I came in the back, and everybody was talking about praising the Lord, and I thought, 'I am home. Finally, a group of people who want to praise the Lord and help their fellow man just like Jesus did and just like Jesus taught.' Thank you so much for doing that for me."

Rats. That did it.

That last Splenetic ejaculation was too much for me. My eyes and ears are bleeding all over the keyboard.