Throw in a box of cubans and you've got yourself a deal, brother.

Taranto's back! Hooray, Taranto!

Getting Clinton's Goat

"Former US president Bill Clinton has been offered 40 goats and 20 cows for his daughter by a love-struck African government official," Sky News reports:

Mr Clinton was offered the deal on a recent trip to Kenya.

He was offered the animals as a traditional African way of getting a father to give away his daughter's hand in marriage. . . .

Godwin Kipkemoi Chepkurgor wrote to Mr Clinton through Kenya's Foreign Minister.

He said: "Had I succeeded in wooing Chelsea, I would have had a grand wedding.
"I would have invited South African Anglican Archbishop Desmond Tutu to preside at the ceremony."

Nairobi's Standard has more details on the offer:

In 2000 when Chelsea, her father and mother, now Senator Hilary [sic] Rodham Clinton, visited East Africa, Chepkurgor, then a Fourth Year student at Moi University, tried to make his intention clear. He wrote to Clinton, offering himself as a suitor for Chelsea. . . .

He sent the letter through then Foreign Affairs minister Dr Bonaya Godana and then US Ambassador to Kenya Johnny Carson.

But, instead of the positive response he was anticipating, Chepkurgor received visitors from the National Security Intelligence Service (NSIS). His letter had sent security chiefs in a spin. . . .

"I could not even meet Johnny Carson so I wrote the letter," he says.
In the letter, Chepkurgor praised Clinton's leadership style, the Monica Lewinsky scandal notwithstanding. He commended Hillary for standing by her husband "like an African woman" in the face of the scandal. He told Clinton to consider retiring to Africa.

It doesn't sound as though his prospects with Chelsea are very promising, and he definitely won't meet Johnny Carson now--though maybe it would be some consolation if Jay Leno would invite him on.