The McCain faction of Repansycan appeasers loses big time.

We're going to hear all sorts of nonsense about this one, kiddies. Cinch your reality cap on really, really tightly and beware the Mediawock.

A former Republican congressman narrowly* beat his Democratic rival early Wednesday to fill the House seat once held by jailed Randy "Duke" Cunningham, one of several contests in eight states closely watched as a possible early barometer of next fall's vote.

Republican Brian Bilbray emerged victorious after a costly and contentious special election race against Democrat Francine Busby, a local school board member.

"I think that we're going back to Washington," Bilbray told cheering supporters. He will serve out the remaining seven months of Cunningham's term and get a boost for the November election.

With 90 percent of precincts reporting, Bilbray had 56,130 votes, or 50 percent. Busby trailed with 51,292 votes, or 45 percent.

*Granted, I have not studied political science (Oxymoron of the Day) since Machiavelli was a boy, but five percentage points is still a major win. Especially in 50/50 America.

The race was viewed by Democrats as an opportunity to capture a solidly Republican district and build momentum on their hopes to capture control of the House.

Also in California, State Treasurer Phil Angelides narrowly beat Controller Steve Westly in the state's gubernatorial primary. He next faces GOP Gov.
Arnold Schwarzenegger, who faced no credible opposition in his party's nomination.

With 92 percent of precincts reporting, Angelides had 921,392 votes, or 48 percent, to Westly's 843,066 votes, or 44 percent.

"You've given me a chance to fight for you, for the California of our dreams, and I will not let you down," Angelides said while his supporters chanted, "Go, Phil, go!"

The race proved long on negative ads and short on excitement and attention, giving the Republican governor a timely lift as he publicly launches his re-election drive Wednesday.

Elsewhere, Alabama Gov. Bob Riley easily beat back a GOP primary challenge from Ten Commandments judge Roy Moore, while Democratic former Gov. Don Siegelman — who campaigned while on trial on corruption charges — lost his comeback fight against Lt. Gov. Lucy Baxley.
Also in Alabama, voters passed a ban on gay marriage by a 4-to-1 margin.

Riley said voters saw state government has changed while he has been in office. "People appreciated the difference in the level of corruption we had in the past and the corruption we don't have today," he said. His challenger, Moore, the former state chief justice who became a hero to the religious right in 2003 when he was ousted after refusing to remove the Commandments monument from the state judicial building, said: "God's will has been done."

Due to time constraints, we now move to further action.

National Democrats spent nearly $2 million on the race; the GOP spent $4.5 million. President Bush and first lady Laura Bush recorded telephone messages for Bilbray, while the Democrats' last two presidential candidates — John Kerry and Al Gore — urged supporters to back Busby.

The magic the Gore name holds continues to mesmerize us all.

Bilbray, made immigration the centerpiece of his campaign, proposing a fence "from the Pacific Ocean to the Gulf of Mexico" and restrictions to keep illegal immigrants from collecting Social Security and other benefits.

We'll see what he does in Washington.

Busby focused her campaign on public dissatisfaction with the Bush administration and the GOP-led Congress, and assailed Bilbray for working as a lobbyist in Washington. She consistently referred to him as "the lobbyist Bilbray."

Ooooooohhh! Clever!

In New Jersey, Republicans chose Tom Kean Jr., the son of a popular former governor, to challenge Democratic Sen. Robert Menendez in the fall.

He's going to have to have at least 50 more political IQ points than his dad did to even have a chance to be somebody.

A few races brought back some familiar names:

• Jerry Brown — the former California governor, presidential candidate and current Oakland mayor — won the Democratic primary for attorney general.

Old Crazy (except for the time when he was dating a young and smoking Linda Ronstadt) Jerry actually had a blind squirrel with a broken watch moment on tv recently. He said kids in Oakland who failed the state graduation standards test (and therefore could not legally graduate) should not get the fake diplomas issued by the clowns on the Oakland City Council.

• George C. Wallace Jr., son of the former Alabama governor, trailed in the GOP primary for lieutenant governor to attorney Luther Strange but the race goes to a runoff because no one got 50 percent.

Let us hope the name Bob Casey holds no residual paternal magic in Pennsylvania this November.

• Hollywood director Rob Reiner was the leading backer of a measure in California to create a $2.4 billion universal preschool program, which went down to defeat by a 60-to-40-percent margin.

Remember this attempt to brainwash California kiddies, kiddies? Once again, the people got it right.