It seems Bush is trying to accelerate our evolutionary decline by weakening our toes.

This comes from Haaretz.com. It starts out as looney pseudo-scientific bilge...

It was a modest newspaper item, almost an anecdote, published in the hot, dog days of late August: According to a study conducted by American paleo-anthropologist Eric Trinkaus, human toes have become thinner and weaker than they once were because of the use of supportive footwear. Or, in other words, homo sapiens (that is, us) and Neanderthals (who, unlike us, did not survive) were fashion victims. In every sense of the word.

If you take a moment to think about this article, it may well be the key to understanding, albeit only partially, the hottest fashion rage of recent years, which developed into a veritable craze during this past summer: flip-flops - those simple, flat sandals with a flexible upper and a thong that separates the big toe from the rest of the crowd. Thong sandals, or what we call beach shoes, are now no longer viewed as a mere fashion whim, but as a means of self-preservation.

And like all rehabilitation processes, the opposition did not go down without a fight:

In July, for example, a mini-scandal broke out on both sides of the Atlantic "Flip-flopgate," it was dubbed in the United States after a large group of young women, members of Northwestern University's lacrosse team, were invited for a meet-and-greet with the president at the White House. The outrage was exposed in all its shame in the official photograph, published on the university's Web site: At least four of the young women standing in the first row next to the president were wearing flip-flops.

The picture shows George Bush, looking as merry as ever, dressed from top to toe (in black shoes) holding two lacrosse sticks. The lovely players are standing tall, with their toes fully exposed for all to see, as if nothing in the world could be more natural. The Chicago Tribune, which discussed the affair at length, explained that the women did not think that there was anything irregular in their behavior and said their thongs were designer flip-flops, since you asked.

Eventually, the real reasons for writing this story appear. Boredom, the need to fill column inches, and sex. The weird swipe at Bush was probably just a reflex action.

In addition, the more accepted the flip-flop becomes, the more a new type of acceptance of what it is supposed to bare - the female foot - can be seen. No longer confined in a leather prison, elevated and adorned (some might say exciting), it finds its natural place in its original contour, exposed and free.

When the exposed foot becomes a common sight everywhere, it becomes accessible. And when it is accessible, those who nevertheless frown at them for their own reasons, find themselves inundated by it on all sides.

On the one hand, the foot represents a constant temptation - to steal a glimpse, to see if this particular human organ complements others parts of the body, if it is "pretty? - while on the other hand, because it is exposed for all to see, without the manipulations or distortions created by high heels and straps, it loses its suggestiveness, its traditional status, and most importantly, its rareness in social situations.

Oh yeah. Throw in an expert to make it sound serious.

Dr. Eyal Dotan, a local researcher of culture, sees no difference between a foot fetish and a shoe fetish, and does not think that a foot that becomes more "accessible" from one year to the next changes the balance of power.

"People can enjoy all kinds of objects without having the complex psychological makeup that involves fetishism, not pathologically in any case," says Dotan. "And, in general, most psychological characteristics are acquired, and acquired relatively quickly. They can be gotten rid of or held in check?

So what do those that take pleasure in bare toes benefit from? "Male enjoyment is by definition fetishism," says Dotan. "Men view women as objects; that's how they get enjoyment and that's fine. Some men become more specific [in their fetishism]. We can just call them 'specialists?

Tal Niv, the author, should have stuck with the evolutionary decline angle and then sold it to The Onion or Washington's other newspaper. You know, like this: "Western Civilization is doomed by footwear." or "Barefoot moslems are our superiors." Maybe take it all the way with lines like this: "How can we hope to defeat an enemy who can hang from trees with his bare toes?"