Laugh from the past: Hitlery tried to join the Marines.

NewsMax.com reminded me of this howler from the Naughty Nineties:


Hillary Clinton: I Tried to Join the Marines

USA Today's report on Sen. Hillary Clinton's newfound appeal as a possible commander in chief omitted a key part of her resume that proves she's long been a hawk on military and defense issues: her attempt to join the Marines 30 years ago.

Or at least that's what she claimed.

Seated beside her husband, the former first lady recounted her military experience during a 1994 TV interview.

"Gee, now it was probably 19 years ago - in 1975," Mrs. Clinton recalled. "I decided that I was very interested in having some experience in serving in some capacity in the military."

Dictator comes to mind. She'd look hot in one of those Mussolini outfits.

"Because we all love the military so much," Mr. Clinton interjected helpfully.

You just have to laugh at crap like this. Because the old cliche is true: "Clintons. Can't live with 'em. Can't shoot 'em."

Of course, Benito and his squeeze ended up hanging upside down from a lamppost. (It may take us some time, but we Italians usually get it right eventually.)

Hillary resumed: "So I walked into our local recruiting office, and I think it was just my bad luck that the person who happened to be there on duty could not have been older than 21. He was in perfect physical shape."

She remembered telling the recruiter, "I wanted to explore - I didn't know whether I thought active duty would be a good idea, reserve, you know, maybe National Guard, something along those lines."

But Hillary's bid to become a leatherneck soon came unraveled.

"This young man looked at me and he said, 'How old are you?'" she recalled.

"I said, 'Well, 27' ... I had these really thick glasses on.

"He said, 'How bad's your eyesight?'

"I said, 'It's pretty bad.'

"And he said, 'How bad?'

"So I told him.

"He said, 'That's pretty bad.'

"And he finally said to me, he said: 'You're too old. You can't see. And you're a woman.' And then he went on ... this man, young man, was a Marine.

"He said, 'But maybe the dogs [Army] would take you.'"

"This is not a very encouraging conversation," Mrs. Clinton recalled thinking. "So maybe I'll look for another way to serve my country."

Yeah. Try destroying it. That'll help.

The original transcript of Hillary's "I-tried-to-join-the-Marines" interview has vanished from the LexisNexis archives, but excerpts from a rebroadcast on Rush Limbaugh's old TV show are still available.