From The Jewish World Review: Dean reassures Dems: ‘we will find a way to mess this up’
By Andy Borowitz
DNC chief determined to uphold losing tradition
Amid a growing belief that there is no way the Democrats can blow the 2006 midterm elections, Democratic National Committee chief Howard Dean sought today to reassure the party faithful that the party was "doing everything in its power" to uphold its losing tradition.
At a top-level summit called "Defeat: 2006" being held in Boston, the former Vermont Governor gave a rousing speech to concerned Democrats, bringing his audience to his feet by vowing, "I can assure each and every one of you, we will find a way to screw this up."
With President Bush's approval rating below thirty percent and key Republican members of Congress the targets of ethics probes, many Democrats have been worried that their historic role as losers and sad sacks might come to an abrupt end this November, a fear Mr. Dean attempted to quell today.
"Folks, let's not forget, we're Democrats," Mr. Dean said. "If there's a way to lose, we will find it."
Carol Foyler, a longtime Democrat from Bethesda, Maryland who attended the summit, said that she had been worried that the Democrats might somehow pull out a victory in 2006, but added, "Just knowing that Howard Dean is in charge makes me feel much more confident about losing."
Elsewhere, after a study by the Georgetown School of Medicine said that millions of dollars are wasted on unnecessary medical tests, the American Medical Association said that there might be something wrong with the author of the study and he should come in for a checkup immediately.
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It seems Pope Francis needs to brush up on his Tertullian!
It has been reported (in The ChristLast Media, I must note) that the current Pope does not like the phrase "lead us not into temptation...
"Let no freedom be allowed to novelty, because it is not fitting that any addition should be made to antiquity. Let not the clear faith and belief of our forefathers be fouled by any muddy admixture." -- Pope Sixtus III
Friday, June 02, 2006
Right Wing Smile of the Day.
Posted by TheChurchMilitant at 3:18 PM
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About Me
- TheChurchMilitant
- First of all, the word is SEX, not GENDER. If you are ever tempted to use the word GENDER, don't. The word is SEX! SEX! SEX! SEX! For example: "My sex is male." is correct. "My gender is male." means nothing. Look it up. What kind of sick neo-Puritan nonsense is this? Idiot left-fascists, get your blood-soaked paws off the English language. Hence I am choosing "male" under protest.
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