What do you do when you can't find 74,000 sodomites, babykillers, commies, thieves, liars, heretics, and assorted other perverts to fill an outdoor stadium?

Scream "40% chance of rain" and use the 20,000 morons you already have to fill the indoor arena.

From Yahoo News:

Obama moves speech indoors

 Citing "severe weather forecasts," the Democratic National Convention Committee announced Wednesday that President Barack Obama would move his prime-time acceptance speech from Bank of America Stadium to a smaller, indoor venue nearby.

They'd sound more credible if they claimed Bush made it rain on their Nuremberg II.

"We have been monitoring weather forecasts closely and several reports predict thunderstorms in the area, therefore we have decided to move Thursday's proceedings to Time Warner Cable Arena to ensure the safety and security of our delegates and convention guests," DNCC CEO Steve Kerrigan said in a statement.

Republicans had questioned whether Obama could fill the stadium's 73,778 seats (and needled Democrats for holding their big event in a venue named for a bank associated with unpopular Wall Street bailouts). Kerrigan's statement said 65,000 people had signed up for "community credentials" to see the president speak.